The translation looks quite good. The only mistake I saw was in the translation of "jo mai mai he desitjat que deixés el seu marit." This means "never have I ever wished she would leave her husband," not "never have I ever wished I could leave my husband." 'Deixés' is the first and third person singular of the imperfect subjunctive, but in this case you can tell it is the third person singular that is meant because it is followed by "el seu marit" not "el meu marit."

Then, I just have a few nit-picky things, little things that would make it sound a little more natural in English:
- "asleep in the stroller" for "dormida en el cotxet" (not "on the stroller")
- "the whole gang trickles in" for "Va arribant tota la colla"
- "I take a sip" rather than "I drink." That's what the original says, and I think it sounds better in English, too.
- "the baby's sleeping" for "que la nena dorm" ('girl' suggests an older child, but their daughter is in a stroller)

But, like I said, those things are just little stylistic suggestions. If you fix the line about Judit leaving her husband, let me know and I will update my rating.