Hot Dogs - Ja so warn's, die alten Rittersleut. (English translation)

English translation

So they fared, the ancient knights of old

In England many years ago
Upon a hill stood a Chateau
Knights there lived, I told you so
Fear and dread they did not know
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
On the tower, a watchman peered
And into the distance stared
That noone would dare the skit
And in the courtyard take a...look
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
On the lawn of Chateau Suisse
A cavalier had to take a piss
A stone was thrown by his old shrew
And his junk was cut in two
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
When a knight went on crusade
He cast in iron wife and maid
But his squire Frederic
Didn't mind the rhetoric
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Dame Joanne, the Bishop's sister
Had on her bum a water blister
She wore a belt of chastity
It scrubbed her skin horrendously
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
The abbess had made many friends
The abbot put her in iron pants
The minstrel didn't care one bit
And brought along his metal snips
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Once a knight sat on his palfrey
And played cards with squire Ralphie
They drank beer, had to let water
But he just had to lift the garter
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
The maid of the Count of Toulouse
Her skin all covered in tattoos
When for to sleep he found no nerve
He had nice pictures to observe
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
And daring young Count Alistair
He sled down a flight of stairs
A nail stood out, thus him de-sired
Now he leads the abbey's choir
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
The daughter of the Count of Bude
Was Cornwall's utmost, biggest prude!
Each gent that came for a cup o' tea
She had him sit on the settee
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
The valet of Countess Bernadotte
Fell asleep on the chamber pot
Past midnight yelled his royal Miss
Get off now! 'gotta take a piss!
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Handsome squire Godefrey
Lord, i swear, this chap was gay !
Stuck copper wire up his ass
And waited for a lightning flash
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
When the knights of old passed gass
It warmed their armor made of brass
But their nose was firm and stout
They let it through the Visor out
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
The thick wife of Knights Templar Arn
Noone could resist her charm
Everyone just grabbed the maid
And stared at her balustrade
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Arn's wife curiously inquired
Tried to kiss a royal squire
The seasoned squire feared no dread
And carried her straight to his bed
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
At Newcastle 'pon river Tyne
Sir Robert was the greatest swine
He acted like a shameless whore
Shat into every cannon bore
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Abbé Pierre, the french apostle
Ran scolding from the village hostel
One welsh maid (her name was Crowder)
Had dowsed her cunt in itching powder
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
And the son of Viscount Rump
Every treestub tried to hump
Once it felt warm above his knees
He must have struck a hive of bees
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Dame Fiona, that old noodle
Kept a bred of five big poodles
Though the knights begged her all day
Her dogs she deemed a better lay
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Lady Fraser, Lady Ann
Took their scot squires to the Glen
Thus Sir Duncan and his friend
Had to use their hands again
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
And the niece of Abbot Simon
Still had her virginial hymen
Then her provincial cousin came
To him it was all the same..
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Friar Benedict had the biggest sword
Belly hair dense as a calving cord
Hung like the mallet of a bell
His crabs and scabies lived quite well
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the knights of old (2x)
 
Knightly damsel Jen lived wild
From a moor carried a child
But Sir Henry said "Well done!"
"Long as it's no irish scum.." (B)
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the knights of old (2x)
 
For lovemaking, every knight
Had to put his armor 'aside
Quite laborious, things turned out
That's the reason they died out
 
So they fared, so they fared
So they fared, the knights of old (2x)
 
On said hill, the knights of old
Now all dead, so I've been told
But their ghosts, in Chateau's walls
Still spook around down in the vaults
 
So they are, so they are
So they are, the ancient knights of old (2x)
 
Submitted by SaintMark on Tue, 07/11/2017 - 17:02
Author's comments:

TL mine.
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A very loose adaptation (not really a "translation") befitting a very loose song.
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(A)
The original german version is about castle Grünwald in Bavaria.
Grünwald is one of the wealthiest municipalities in Germany, and the location of the Bavaria movie studios.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gr%C3%BCnwald,_Bavaria
(B) prussians and bavarians generally hate each other.
Since this is the english version i turned it into english and irish.

German (Austrian/Bavarian)

Ja so warn's, die alten Rittersleut.

See also
Comments
petit élève    Tue, 07/11/2017 - 17:16

Regular smile

dare the skit -> I'm not familiar with that expression. You mean "dare to try" or something?

Abbé Pierre -> hahaha I can hardly imagine a wise man like him falling for such a nasty trick

SaintMark    Tue, 07/11/2017 - 19:02

"dare the skit.." sometimes i make up new expressions, if they're borderline doable.. in poetry there are few rules.
skit can be a comical sketch, meaning a dare. so i think its ok.. otherwise what rhymes with "shxt".. i can't think of another word..

SaintMark    Mon, 27/11/2017 - 01:11

stanza 10 "Mei wie war des Madl brenzi".. i still haven't figured if that verb actually means "horny" or the exact opposite "prude".. Can't find "brenzi" in any bavarian dictionary... any bavarians among us?