He empious, disloyal, mean (L'empio, sleale, indegno)

Italian

L'empio, sleale, indegno

 
L'empio, sleale, indegno
vorria rapirmi il regno
e disturbar così la pace mia
 
Ma perda pur la vita
prima che in me tradita
dall'avido suo cor la fede sia
 
Submitted by ihatespaghetti on Mon, 20/03/2017 - 16:52
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English translation

He empious, disloyal, mean

Versions: #1#2
He empious, disloyal, mean
Would like to take away my kingdom from me
And doing so unsettle my peace
 
But may I as well lose my life
Before my faithfulness is broken
By that greedy heart of his
 
If the text above is submitted as a rhythmical or rhyming translation, that means: a version that aims to retain the metric pattern of the original, so as to have a text to sing along to, in a karaoke fashion, or at least to preserve the rhyming scheme. The fun part is trying to mimic both the metrics and the rhyming structure of lyrics written in another language, while keeping the meaning (uhm, overall) the same. But the text will not be translated verbatim.
That I am not going to do when the song is yet to be translated in a literal way. I may be handling that part first, every now and then.
* * *
I'm ever glad to receive suggestions, and if you spot a mistake, do make me notice: it will be very much appreciated.
Submitted by subterlabentia on Tue, 21/03/2017 - 09:57
Added in reply to request by ihatespaghetti
More translations of "L'empio, sleale, indegno"
Italian → English - subterlabentia
Comments
ihatespaghetti    Mon, 27/03/2017 - 14:07

Very pretty translation! I love it.

What do you think of translating "indegno" as "unworthy", as if to say he's unworthy of the kingdom? Or do you think that meaning wasn't intended?

subterlabentia    Mon, 27/03/2017 - 14:58

Consider that I just jotted down the traslation of this commonplace aria d'indignazione, so I didn't really overthink it. But neither did I overinterpretated: it's staple food for the opera villain to be called "indegno", plus it rhymes with regno, so... I just drew on a most generic adjective. The line sounds truncated, though, so I could have done better.