Annie Villeneuve - Que feras-tu de nous (English translation)

English translation

What Will You Do about Us

If you’re no longer here to talk to me about it
If you’re no longer here to tell it to me
You’re my only reason for existing
I want to write it
If you’re the one who I was afraid of
Afraid of losing at any moment
How can I tell you that I miss you so much?
 
I would follow you into the shadows to tell you to come back
 
And if you leave me again a little
If you take me away from us
If your scent isn’t mine any more
What will you do about us tomorrow?
If you leave me again a little
If you deprive me of your eyes
If your smile isn’t mine anymore
What will you do about us?
 
If the wind brought us back to each other
Just for a few hours, I promise you
I’d tell you all about my pain
But if the wind is nothing but a storm
To take away in its passing
All the harm that you’ve done to me
All the clouds
 
I’d follow you into the shadows to tell you, “You can leave.”
 
And if you leave me again a bit
If you take me away from us
If your scent isn’t mine anymore
What will you do with us tomorrow?
If you leave me again a little
If you deprive me of your eyes
If your smile isn’t mine anymore
What will you do about us?
 
If you leave me again a little
If you take me away from us
If your scent isn’t mine anymore
What will you do about us tomorrow?
If you leave me again a little
If you deprive me of your eyes
If your smile isn’t mine anymore
What will you do about us?
 
What will do you?
 
Submitted by tdwarms on Wed, 08/11/2017 - 09:29
French

Que feras-tu de nous

Annie Villeneuve: Top 3
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Comments
petit élève    Wed, 08/11/2017 - 10:10

Well that's Canadian French, that might be why to me it sounds slightly broken, and so vague I can't really understand what she means in a few lines.

plus là -> rather "no longer here"

dont j’avais peur -> you translated it as "pour qui j'avais peur". here it's "who I was afraid of"

Peur de perdre à tout moment -> that's actually broken French, she should use a different relative pronoun to introduce the direct object complement ("que j'avais peur de perdre...)

si tu me quittes encore un peu -> sounds really odd in (standard) French. "quitter" is not something you can do "a little".

tu m’enlèves de nous deux -> that's the other way around Regular smile (me from us)

Que feras-tu de nous -> I rather understand it as "what will you turn us into" or "what will you do with our love story", but that might be Canadian French

Je te dirais tout de ma douleur -> rather "I'll tell you all about my pain"

n’est que tempête -> is nothing but (a) storm

Mais, si le vent n’est que tempête pour emporter sur son passage tout le mal que tu m’as fait, tous les nuages, je te suivrais dans l’ombre pour te dire, "Tu peux partir." -> grammatically this big lump of words is supposed to be a single (and pretty eye-watering) sentence Teeth smile
That mean "partirais" (conditional) violates time consistency, and "pour emporter" basically means "qui emportera" here (the rest is a big subordinate clause).

tdwarms    Wed, 08/11/2017 - 10:14
petit élève wrote:

si tu me quittes encore un peu -> sounds really odd in (standard) French. "quitter" is not something you can do "a little".

Yeah, it sounds a bit odd in English too.

I think the English "what will you do about us" can tolerate the meaning of "what will you do with our love story." It's kind of like saying, "what will you make of us." Do you think I should change it?

And I'm not going to lie... I don't think I fully understand your last comment... You're saying it's all one enormous ugly sentence, right? Regular smile

Thanks for helping me.

petit élève    Wed, 08/11/2017 - 11:22

Do you think I should change it? -> no, that's OK. I suppose that's what is meant here, the way of saying is just a bit odd, probably due to Canadian French.

Oops I got carried away.
Yes, the whole bunch cannot be anything but a single sentence, what with the verb being found only in the last line.
That sounds really convoluted to me. I'll translate it as
"but if the wind is nothing but a storm that would sweep away all the harm you did to me and all the clouds, then I will [written as "would"] follow you into the shadow to tell you whatever it is I have to tell you " Teeth smile

tdwarms    Wed, 08/11/2017 - 10:50

Yeah, that's a pretty long sentence... I don't think English has seen a sentence that long since 1850...