Softy (Weichei)

English translation

Softy

A woman like you needs no
Always-yes-man¹, oh no!
No lights-out-lover²
And how-did-I-do-asker³, oh no!
No hat and
Crocheted-pillow-driver⁴,
No penny-pincher
And piggybank-saver...
 
A woman like you needs no
Fine-rib-wearer⁵, oh no!
And no precise wrapping-paper-
Folder, oh no!
No airplane-flight-
Applauder⁶
And on-holiday-sunlounger-
Reserver
No woman's man⁷ and
Man who looks away from cleavage!
 
A softy for breakfast,
A protective cover user in bed,
No-one can deal with that,
Toss him out!
 
A woman like you needs no
Sock-folder⁸, oh no!
No mummy's-
Boy⁹, oh no!
No talk-show viewer,
No petty rocker,
No biscuit-dunker¹⁰,
And couch potato!
 
A woman like you needs no
Secret porno watcher, oh no!
And who doesn't want to do Beate Uhse¹¹,
Oh no!
No outdoor smoker
And Viagra user
No "Mausimama"-in-your-
Ear-whisperer...¹²
No sissy film-blubberer
No Lindenstraße-knower¹³
 
A softy for breakfast,
A bathing cap wearer in the bath,
That really is a horror,
Toss him out!
 
No bladder-tea-drinker¹⁴
Constant-TV-Watcher-
Oh no!
No cheap-bargain-buyer
And nappy-changing papa - oh no!
 
A softy for breakfast,
A "fake macho"¹⁵ at the table,
How the fuck do you deal with this guy,
Toss him out!
 
A softy for breakfast,
A know-it-all in the house,
Now I can't deal with him anymore,
I'm tossing him out!
A "fake macho" at the table,
How can you even stand this guy,
Toss him out!
 
Submitted by Rawrren on Thu, 22/09/2016 - 09:23
Added in reply to request by pooksahib
Last edited by Rawrren on Sun, 25/09/2016 - 21:53
Author's comments:

The entire song mocks a certain type of person known as "spießig" is Germany - usually a male that follows social norms and is closed-minded.

¹ A "yes-man" is someone who says yes to everything regardless of how he feels about it.
² Someone who insists upon having sex with the lights out.
³ Someone who is insecure about their sexual performance (asks "how did I do" after)
⁴ To say that someone drives wearing a hat and with a crocheted pillow in the back means they're a terrible driver.
⁵ A type of material; sometimes associated with white briefs.
⁶ People who applaud when their plane lands, it's cringey
⁷ As opposed to a "man's man" (a manly man)
⁸ This term means someone who is pedantic (like someone who insists on folding socks)
⁹ Someone over-attached to their mum (thinks their mum is the best cook)
¹⁰ Taking the piss out of people who put biscuits into drinks,
¹¹ Beate Uhse was a female pilot who founded the first sex shop ever.
¹² Mausimama is a cringey German pet name which would be related to a 'mummy kink', so the girl doesn't need someone who whispers such names in her ear.
¹³ Lindenstraße is a German TV show, idk whether there's a stereotype about people who watch it.
¹⁴ Refers to people who drink "bladder tea" (a herbal remedy... what is wrong with the world...)
¹⁵ A macho is a type of guy who is tough/hard, acts as if he's the best etc. and a macho would never eat Müsli!

Many thanks to pooksahib for their help with some meanings and to athenastudying from tumblr Regular smile

Idioms from "Weichei"
Comments
pooksahib    Thu, 22/09/2016 - 11:57

Great work Rawrren, thanks. (2) will be a man who insists on sex with the lights out. (3) – a man insecure about his 'performance'. (6) a plane-spotter (nerd). (9) 'Mummy's boy' would most likely be the phrase used if this was an English song.

Rawrren    Thu, 22/09/2016 - 15:03

Thanks a lot, I've updated the lyrics and someone else confirmed what "mausimama" was about.

Hoping someone can help figure out Autofahrer and Müslimacho.
--
With the help of some natives from tumblr I've now got all the meanings down and all the notes updated, voila!

pooksahib    Fri, 23/09/2016 - 05:20

Lindenstraße is a 'soap-opera', a long running (often never ending) fictional series about the daily lives of everyday people.

Rawrren    Fri, 23/09/2016 - 08:46
pooksahib wrote:

Lindenstraße is a 'soap-opera', a long running (often never ending) fictional series about the daily lives of everyday people.

Yeah i'm aware but I can't see how that'd be a bad thing for someone to watch, 'cause we don't have such a stereotype about soaps in the UK x)

pooksahib    Fri, 23/09/2016 - 12:01

Well, soaps are generally watched by women...

Rawrren    Fri, 23/09/2016 - 17:35
pooksahib wrote:

Well, soaps are generally watched by women...

I didn't know that tbh, in the UK i've met plenty of men who watch soaps :S

Hansi K_Lauer    Fri, 23/09/2016 - 21:14

fn14: You haven't gotten this one quite correctly.
"Blasenteeschlucker" means someone who drinks bladder tea.

>"Ständig-in-die-Röhre-Gucker-" means someone who watches TV all the time
"die Röhre" is a synonym for TV, referring to the old tube technique

>"How the fuck..." isn't really the terminology Udo Jürges would prefer...
Wink smile

Rawrren    Sat, 24/09/2016 - 19:03
Hansi K_Lauer wrote:

fn14: You haven't gotten this one quite correctly.
"Blasenteeschlucker" means someone who drinks bladder tea.

>"Ständig-in-die-Röhre-Gucker-" means someone who watches TV all the time
"die Röhre" is a synonym for TV, referring to the old tube technique

>"How the fuck..." isn't really the terminology Udo Jürges would prefer...
Wink smile

Thanks for this Regular smile will update soon. Uhh... silly question... what is "bladder tea"?
--
I will change how the fuck but FYI I used that as another song I've seen in the past which uses a similar phrase had that translation, so I just went with that.

Rawrren    Sun, 25/09/2016 - 21:51

Oh my, looks like they have remedies for everything nowadays lmfao.

pooksahib    Sat, 24/09/2016 - 03:36

Hi Hansi. As a fan of Udo, I had my doubts about 'fuck' as well so I asked a German friend of mine to have a look at this. Her translation is "How can you just stand/endure/bear this guy?"