The Cosmonaut
- Artiste: Melotron
- Album: Sternenstaub
- Chanson: Der Kosmonaut
- Traduction : allemand → anglais
- Publié par
Tigerfire310 le Lun, 23/07/2012 - 20:34
Der Kosmonaut
Zum Abflug bereit
Er checkt die Daten
Ist alles okay?
Der Countdown läuft
Es folgt der Start
Das Ziel der Mission
Stand nicht in den Karten
Das ist schon okay!
Wahrscheinlich der Letzte
Seiner Art
Und das Blau wird immer greller
Und das Herz schlägt immer schneller
Gott weiß, was hier passiert
Es ist alles voller Sterne
Das Experiment
Kann nicht mehr warten
Welches Experiment?
So ein Raumanzug
Ist viel zu eng
Nochmal zwei Kapseln
Dann kann er starten
Das ist schon okay!
Die Tür geht auf
Das Leben ist hart
Und das Schwarz wird immer schneller
Und das Herz schlägt immer greller
Gott weiß, was hier passiert
Es steht alles in den Sternen
Es ist schon okay!
Alles okay!
The Cosmonaut
Ready for the departure
He checks the data
Is everything okay?
The countdown runs
Until the start
The mission objective
Was not on the maps
But that's okay!
He's probably the last
Of his kind
And the blue is more and more dazzling
And the heart beats faster and faster
God knows, what happens here
It is all full of stars
The experiment
Can wait no more
Which experiment?
Such a spacesuit
Is far too tight
Once more, two capsules
Then he can start
That's okay!
The door opens
The life is tough
And the black is faster and faster
And the heart beats more and more dazzlingly
God knows, what happens here
It stands all in the stars
That's okay!
Everything's okay!
I don't want to be rude, but frankly I think you should pay more attention to the general meaning.
At times it feels like you're simply stitching dictionnary lookups together.
1) "Es folgt der Start"
Litterally "Start follows [the countdown]". I would say "The countdown runs / until the start.
2) "Das Ziel der Mission stand nicht in den Karten. Das ist schon okay! wahrscheinlich der Letzte seiner Art"
The mission objective was not on the maps, but that's allright. It's probably the last of its kind.
(Art = sort,kind ≠ Kunst)
3) "Und das Blau wird immer greller, und das Herz schlägt immer schneller"
And the blue is more and more dazzling, and the heart beats faster and faster.
(immer + comparative = more and more...)
4) "Gott weiß, was hier passiert"
God knows what happens here
(present, not past, and it means "nobody knows...")
5) "So ein Raumanzug ist viel zu eng"
Such a spacesuit is much to tight
('so' means 'such a' in this context)
the last 3 paragraphs should be corrected according to some of the previous remarks.
Thank you for your helpful comment! Many words in this song pertained to space (i.e. Raumanzug, Abflug), so yes, I used a dictionary more than I often do...guess that didn't work out for me. Also, I left "God knows what happens here" because in English, saying 'god knows' means 'nobody knows' as well, so I saw no need to change it. Thank you for all the help~!
Sorry if my initial comment sounded a bit harsh.
Anyway, I think the new version looks a lot better.
Nice work!
No offense taken~ thank you for all the help, I think the new version works better as well, and I'm glad we were able to work together. I feel my German has improved from doing these translations 
Oops, by the way :
"Wahrscheinlich der Letzte seiner Art"
That can't be the objective (das Ziel, neutral), so I guess it's the cosmonaut. My mistake.
Commentaires