The ravens (Ravnene)

traduction en anglais

The ravens

Versions : #1#2
As I was walking all alone,
I heard two ravens making a moan;
One said to the other,
"Where shall we go and dine today?"
"Where shall we go and dine today?"
"In behind that old turf wall,
I sense there lies a newly slain knight;
And nobody knows that he lies there,
But his hawk, his hound and his lady fair."
"His hound is to the hunting gone,
His hawk to fetch the wild-fowl home,
His lady's has taken another mate,
So we may make our dinner sweet."
"You will sit on his white neck-bone,
And I'll peck out his pretty blue eyes;
With one lock of his golden hair
We'll thatch our nest when it grows bare."
Publié par TrampGuy le Ven, 30/09/2011 - 02:23
Commentaires de l’auteur(e) :

The original text is a Scottish ballad called "The twa corbies", first translated to Danish by Svend Grundtvig.
The tune is taken from a Breton song called "An alarc'h".
The english translation I put is a general existing translation, who is not 1 to 1 with the norwegian text but very close. I chose it because it is traslated nicely, and keeps the rhymes. The norwegian text really did not stray much from the original song.

For all this info and more, check the youtube link of this song and the wikipedia entry here :

Note : Aucun(e) Moyenne : 5 (1 vote)
Plus de traductions de « Ravnene »
norvégien → anglais - TrampGuy
Baccaratta    Jeu, 27/09/2012 - 13:44

There are some arguable " errors here
1. "der ligger en nyslagen ridder forvisst" this sentence affirm that he is laying there, also forvisst could possibly be a typo for forvist(banished) as i can't see forvisst making sense unless it's in dialect. I would probably have written the sentence either "there lies a newly slain knight, banished" or "there lies a banished knight, newly slain"

2. "Hans frue har givet en annen sin tro" I will not say your translation here is wrong, but I think you can maybe hit the meaning better if you say "His wife has lied her faith/heart(con.sen) in another mans hands"

3. "så hogger jeg ut hans øyne blå" In the norwegian sentence the adjective fin(pretty) is abscent, I don't think it benfits the the translation of the meaning either, more the other way around.

4. "vi dekker vårt rede neste vår" Maybe I missunderstand your translation here but "neste vår" means "next spring" so I would have written the sentence "We'll thatch our nest when spring arrives"

Here you will lure the first 5-star out of me, this text is of very high difficulty and the job you have done here is phenomenal. There are a few very minor error and arguable alternative translation options but none and especially the last one will not drag down the rating just because of the sheer difficulty.

Be proud because this is pretty damn close to perfect!

TrampGuy    Jeu, 27/09/2012 - 17:45

Thanks! Regular smile

But really, as you can see in the added comment :
1. This is more of an English interpretation than a literal translation - so literal discrepancies as the ones you've mentioned were noted, yet overlooked for the sake of the interpretation.
2. I don't really deserve the credit nor could I be held responsible for any "errors", as I didn't come up the translation myself. This text is well versed, so much so that it has been translated an adapted to many languages probably even before I was born. I just proofread it, made sure it corresponds nicely with the Norwegian text (which is actually the one adapted from English) and posted it as is - out of respect to the origin and it's historical and cultural value.

Now, keeping in mind that this is not my own translation - I would like to refer to some of your comments :

1. If "forvisst" is a typo, then the typo comes straight from the album's inlay - possible, but I doubt it.

2. It's good that you've mentioned this sentence. When translating the text for myself, I came to realize that this sentence convey such a strong notion/emotion, which I'm not even sure could be properly passed in English.
On another note, even though your take on it is better, I still won't change it, in respect to the origin. There's also another user who provided a more literal and exact translation for the whole ballad. But it is between our two versions, where one can spot the difference between a translation and an interpretation.

3 & 4 - Again, overlooking discrepancies for the sake of the interpretation.

To conclude, all I can do is praise the text same as you and agree it deserves the highest of ratings. The original Scottish/Old-English text has all the lines rhymed even better, so it's worth checking out.