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Distanblue

Still the same morning
Still the same waking up
alone in the dirty sheets, fuck!
In the dirty sheets where I sleep
still dreaming of my teeth that are falling
- this time there were also nail clippings
some dried blood
the other day I threw up some broken glass
I'll finish filing them - but it's too late, too late
at the moment I'm picking these teeth separated by tobacco
with the tip of these fingers yellowed by tobacco
I'm feeling this breath aged by tobacco
to exit these lips that won't swallow anything -
or just two three fevers, cans and washed-out pitchers
during these nights
curled up in a ball
when my bones appear translucent
When my heart thumps and punches, clear
against my skin
 
Still the same tears
and I find myself making them fall on the cigarette that's smoking
I spend my time crying doesn't matter when
crying in my bed, crying on the can, crying under the shower
but above all not in front of others, no, that would be rotten
There are writers who know how to make this beautiful
all I can do is to spend the day smoking like a chimney
smoking like a chimney, my arse screwed on the chair, to break
these pathetic smiles that smell of incense
these yellow smiles of a scammer, always with these colourless teeth and lips and this so dried-up tongue stuck against my palate
I can barely stop the wheezy breathing
I prefer also to turn my pale face and clear my throat and swallow up in my fenced sink of a mouth my black slimy wads, my sighs, and then look in the mirror, I poke my trap, I poke my gums
I'd like -
I'd like to kick me in the trap, to kick me in the gums
just to jolt the whine-bag that I am
 
If this evaporates to rejoin the nothingness
if this becomes everything, it's time
time alone that ends up saying it:
A relationship, it's a potential left for the future
but for me, the sky fell down like a lid
with a simple gesture, she closed the circle again
and all I'm left with is an empire of wind and dust
where you don't know how to laugh, where you don't know that the stone
the city isn't but a mass grave, maybe an island, nothing else to do
than to look at them draining beside other things its wounds, and the cracks on its shoreline
But why is it that I should still bleed?
I already feel sufficiently drained
 
She had to remember that she no longer loved me
the only desire that she left me with was sleeping with my brother
everything will be fine - the pain comes, the pain goes
you're getting there
 
Like the rubbish rise back to the surface
you wake up one morning without this sour smell, this smell of more (of the same)
you realise that suffering is always better than death
it's also less definitive
I have no desire, I have no desire, I have no desire to continue tracing the perimeter of my life
I still have a few miles left and a few desires
I can still go flying far away on the smoke
until the canopy turns blue
and I can still steal some living, burn my eyes
to stop the sun from setting
maybe you find it ugly
it's true that there's nothing but cinders, nothing but rock
still and all I'm left here with my empire of wind and dust that's not for sale
I am a king here and I sleep here, I'm so proud of it
my arse sitting in the cold on my stone throne
just like I'm still walking around here
free and my cock in the air
 
Versuri originale

Azulejos

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Comentarii
lolaismylolaismy    Luni, 27/04/2015 - 09:15

You translated this very well! Your word and verb choice are particular to your understanding of the french side and I like it!
The "Si ça s'évapore pour rejoindre le néant" could be translated to
"If this evaporates to rejoin the nothingness" which makes more sense.
Good job! :)

evfokasevfokas
   Vineri, 08/05/2015 - 17:56

Thank you lolaismy for your help and kind words