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Throat With Sand

you see,
the day doesn't dawn
polaco Goyeneche*
sing me one more tango
 
you see,
the night becomes long
your life has a karma:
to sing. always sing
 
your voice
that to tango excites
telling the semicolon
than nobody sang (to tango)
 
your voice
with goblins and ghosts
breaths with the asma
of an old bandoneon
 
sing
throat with sand
your voice has the sorrow
that Malena** didn't sing
sing
that Juarez*** condemns you
by hurting your sorrow
with his white bandoneon
 
sing,
the people are clapping
although you're dying
they don't know your pain
 
sing,
that Troilo**** from heaven
under your pillow
a verse left you
 
singer
of a little bit insolent tango
you made that people
hurt, hurt your pain
 
singer
of an equilibrist tango
more than a singer, an artist
with the vicious of a singer
 
you see
to me and to Buenos Aires,
we're always lack of air
when your voice is not around
 
to you
that so much taught me
the day you sang
a song with me.
 
Оригинални текстови

Garganta con arena

Кликните да видите оригиналне текстове (шпански)

Cacho Castaña: Топ 3
Коментари
Valeriu RautValeriu Raut
   Петак, 17/05/2013 - 00:47
5

Thank you Rachel and welcome on LT site.
I see it is your first and only translation.
Congratulations!
It would have been better to give short explainations about the names: Goyeneche, Malena, Troilo and Juarez.

roster 31roster 31
   Петак, 17/05/2013 - 23:48

I was going to make the same suggestion: some notes on the names to know what the singer is talking about.
On the other hand, you don't need the note "tango the subject" since the subject in the stanza is "tu voz".
Some other comments:
Third stanza: Is 'the dot and the coma' the right translation? Would it be wrong to say 'period'? Or to be exact, 'semicolon'?
Fifth stanza: "that Malena didn't SING"
Sixth stanza: I would say "even if you are dying"
Seventh: Do you think that Troilo is in the sky, or in heavens?

Valeriu RautValeriu Raut
   Петак, 17/05/2013 - 06:30

Rosa querida, tengo problemas con mi ordenador.
No me obedece (se ha puesto como las mujeres).
Voy a escuchar 'Malena' con Troilo.
Gracias y un abrazo.

roster 31roster 31
   Петак, 17/05/2013 - 12:16
roster 31 wrote:

To Vale
Hola, Vale!
Acabo de escuchar el tango 'Malena' interpretado por Troilo. ¿Lo has oído? Te gustaría. También podría ser una bonita traducción.
Take care

roster 31roster 31
   Субота, 18/05/2013 - 00:06

Estás bien informado, y siento la confusion. Yo te dije "interpretado" porque no sabía quién lo cantaba.

Voy a escuchar la version que tú propones

roster 31roster 31
   Субота, 18/05/2013 - 16:49

Very good, Rachel. Thanks again.
One more thing:
Sixth stanza, isn't it "people ARE clapping?