Russia is waging a disgraceful war on Ukraine. Stand With Ukraine!

Кощей бессмертный (Koshchey bessmertnyy) (English translation)

Кощей бессмертный

Заскучал совсем Кощей, ведь вечно он живет,
Избираться снова он на сотый срок идет.
А ему давно всё это до пенька,
Овладела им вселенская тоска.
Иногда ему мерещится сошёл с ума
Он один весь в белом, а вокруг полно дерьма.
Не поймёшь кто друг а кто нажиться хочет,
Вот сидит он во дворце и чуть не плачет.
 
Вот то ли дело юности он нравился себе,
Когда с горячим сердцем вербовался в КГБ.
Вот то ли дело молодость служили в ГДР
Там был сервиз "Мадонна" и был СССР
 
Затосковал Кощей вконец, спина что-то болит
Да здоровье уж не то замучал простатит
И всё гадостью исколото лицо,
Тут достал грустный кощей своё яйцо.
Он достал своё яйцо и положил на стол,
Чтоб его случайно кто-нибудь да вдруг нашел,
и яйцо разбил бы и иглу сломал,
Полномочиям тогда б конец настал.
 
Вот раньше то ли дело, не раздражал никто,
И сны были прекрасные про женщин и дзюдо.
А сейчас одни бандеровцы являются во сне,
Кидаются коктейлями и пишут на стене.
 
Загрустил совсем Кощей, быть может начать пить,
Кроме Ганди не с кем даже и поговорить.
Так ведь Ганди давно превратился в жмых,
А Кощей он всё ещё живей живых.
Тут вздохнул Кощей и тяжко почесал лицо,
С ненавистью посмотрел он на своё яйцо.
Может взять да самому его разбить,
Одним махом все мученья прекратить.
 
Вот то ли дело раньше, был свежим на посту,
И власть казалась слаще и верилось в мечту.
И силою был полон стахановец галер.
Казалось вот немного, вернётся СССР…
 
Покрутил Кощей на пальце обручальное кольцо,
Призадумался, сложил обратно в стол яйцо.
Покряхтел, попукал, зубы снял, зевнул,
С телевизором обнялся и уснул.
 
Last edited by EnjovherEnjovher on Thu, 04/06/2020 - 04:40
English translationEnglish
Align paragraphs

Koschei the immortal

Koschei got bored to death. He's immortal, that's why.
He's about to be elected for the 100th time,
but he stopped giving a damn long ago.
He's been overwhelmed by melancholy.
Sometimes he thinks he's going crazy.
He's pure as the driven snow in a world full of crap
and he can't tell true friends from plain leeches.
And so he sits in his palace, on the brink of tears.
 
Now when he was young, he was quite pleased with
himself, as he enlisted with a burning heart in the KGB
His youth spent serving in the GDR, that was another story.
When there was Madonna china1, there was USSR.
 
Koschei got so depressed that his back started aching.
His health is on the downslide. He's plagued by prostatite,
and they inject all sorts of junk into his face.
So, our sad koschei fetched his egg
He put the egg on the table
hoping for someone to find it unexpectedly
and break it and the needle within
to put an end to his all-mightiness.
 
To think that before, he would have left no one bother him,
and his dreams were wonderful, filled with girls and judo.
But now, he only dreams of those bloody Bandirovtsy2,
throwing Molotov cocktails and scribbling on the walls.
 
Koschei got very sad indeed, he might even hit the bottle.
He has nobody to talk to, except for Ghandi3,
but Ghandi has been feeding the worms for a long time now,
while Koschei is very much alive and kicking.
He cast a mournful glance on his egg, scratched his face,
and stared at the egg with eyes full of hatred.
He could take upon himself to break it,
a single blow that would put right all these torments.
 
To think that before, he was standing keenly at his post
The power seemed so sweet, you could believe in dreams.
He was filled with the strength of a stakhanovist galley hand
It was a bit like if USSR would come back...
 
Koschei twisted his wedding ring around his finger for a while
After a bit of thought he put the egg back on the table,
moaned and farted a bit, took his dentures off, yawned,
hugged his telly and fell asleep.
 
  • 1. An expensive china table set made in GDR that was considered a great luxury inside USSR's sphere of influence
  • 2. Ukrainian radical nationalists
  • 3. Putin showcasing himself as a champion of peace
Thanks!
thanked 2 times
Submitted by GuestGuest on Sat, 08/10/2016 - 00:52
Author's comments:

Though I can't say I got 100% of the allusions, this song got me rolling on the floor. Hope not too many people will feel offended by it.

Putin is depicted as Koschei the evil wizard, from the fairytale The frog princess. The source of his power and immortality is a needle hidden within an egg (the egg being hidden within a lot of other things, but that's enough to get the metaphor, I think).

Comments
Sophia_Sophia_    Sun, 09/10/2016 - 21:45

As for "Cервиз Мадонна" this was dinner services made in East Germany.
"Madonna" became the most popular and well-known in the former USSR.
This china has long been considered an indicator of prestige and well-being of the family. All Soviet housewives dreamed to buy it, and when their dream finally came true, they for sure set the table at main holydays.

Sophia_Sophia_    Sun, 09/10/2016 - 21:09

Пьер, можно я по-русски напишу дальше. В общем, сервиз Мадонна привозили из ГДР сначала офицеры, которые там служили, а потом слава о нем распространилось по всей стране.

Sophia_Sophia_    Mon, 10/10/2016 - 04:27

Don't confuse Latvian with Lithuanian :-)
My ancestors are from Latvia

Sophia_Sophia_    Sun, 09/10/2016 - 21:43

typo in GDR
вербоваться - more like "to be recruited" , enlist
не раздражал никто= никто не раздражал его ---> no one annoyed him

Banderivtsi usually means those Ukrainian nationalists who consider themselves followers of the OUNR

Sophia_Sophia_    Mon, 10/10/2016 - 04:24

No way, I insist on the nationalists, or something like

Sophia_Sophia_    Mon, 10/10/2016 - 06:23

"Ukrainian radical nationalists" will fit better.

Sophia_Sophia_    Sun, 09/10/2016 - 21:47

Я пойду спать, завтра еще свежим взглядом посмотрю!

Sophia_Sophia_    Sun, 09/10/2016 - 21:51

Кряхтеть -to groan, yes
Пукать - to fart

Sophia_Sophia_    Mon, 10/10/2016 - 06:39

Он один весь в белом - this means like he is the only one who is pure, innocent, highly moral

Read about music throughout history