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The Ballad of Gary Johnson lyrics

  • Artist: Holy Bongwater
  • Album: Mock the Vote! 2016
English
English
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The Ballad of Gary Johnson

Gary -- Gary Johnson
He's not Trump or Hillary
 
He came from New Mexico where he smoked pot
He noticed both the candidates say who they're not
He took a big bong rip while he watched C-SPAN
Remarked, "Hey, I'm not either one" and that's how he ran
 
Gary -- Gary Johnson
He's not Trump or Hillary
Gary -- Gary Johnson
So cast your vote for number 3
 
When Bernie Sanders got robbed by the DNC
Gary wondered, "Hey, would his supporters like me?"
He smoked and pondered how to get those Bernie bros
Combined, his name with Bernie's slogan makes a dick joke
 
Gary -- Gary Johnson
He's not Trump or Hillary
Gary -- Gary Johnson
So cast your vote for number 3
 
He's kinda liberal but the taxes he don't love
He kinda wants some anarchy that he's the leader of
He knows that problems go away with legal weed
And he'll never miss a city name when on Jeopardy
 
Gary -- Gary Johnson
He's not Trump or Hillary
Gary -- Gary Johnson
So cast your vote for number 3
 
Gary -- Gary Johnson
He's not Trump or Hillary
Gary -- Gary Johnson
So cast your vote for number 3
 
He won't win either.
 
Thanks!
Submitted by DSMDSM on 2022-10-07
Submitter's comments:

A satiric ballad about Gary Johnson, the Libertarian Party candidate for the 2016 US presidential election. Sung to the melody of "The Ballad of Davy Crockett".

 

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