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Wenn alle Brünnlein fließen (traduction en anglais)

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traduction en anglaisanglais
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When All The Freshets are Flowing

Versions : #1#2
When all the freshets are flowing
A man must drink
When I mayn't call out to my treasure
I wave to her¹ my hand
When I mayn't call out to my treasure
Hallee, hallo, mayn't call out
I wave to her my hand
 
Yes, one little wink of the eye
And lightly tread upon her foot
There's one within the chamber there
Who must be mine
There's one within the chamber there
Hallee, hallo, the chamber there
Who must be mine
 
Why ever should she not be
When I do love her so dear
She has two sweet eyes of blue
That gleam just like two stars
She has two sweet eyes of blue
Hallee, hallo, two sweet eyes
That gleam just like two stars
 
She has two sweet cheeks so red
Redder yet than wine
Such a maiden you'll not find
Anywhere under the sun
Such a maiden you'll not find
Hallee, hallo, you'll not find
Anywhere under the sun
 
Merci !
remercié·e 5 fois
Publié par fulicaseniafulicasenia Jeu, 20/09/2012 - 04:31
Ajouté en réponse à la demande de kevinbajrakevinbajra
Commentaires de l’auteur·e :

Besser gib's nit!

Sorry for the absurdly archaic English, I was having a lot of fun with this! Obviously this is not a word-for-word literal translation, but I think I conveyed the meaning of each line pretty accurately.

Thanks for the excellent comment about the diminutives, Passiflora, I've edited my translation accordingly. As for your other suggestions, they are either incorrect ('redder') or seem perhaps to stem from a lack of familiarity with older English usage (once upon a time we also referred now and then to our darlings as treasures, and talked about men instead of people).

¹ The 'ihm' (lit. 'him') in the original German is the pronoun that matches the grammatical gender of the word 'Schatz,' not the pronoun that matches the biological gender of the person that the singer calls his 'Schatz.'

5
Note : Aucun(e) Moyenne : 5 (1 note)
L’auteur·e de cette traduction a demandé une relecture. Cela signifie qu’il ou elle sera ravi·e de recevoir des remarques, corrections, suggestions, etc. Si vous avez des notions dans ces deux langues, n’hésitez pas à ajouter un commentaire.
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Wenn alle Brünnlein fließen

Traductions de « Wenn alle Brünnlein ... »
anglais fulicasenia
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Expressions idiomatiques dans « Wenn alle Brünnlein ... »
Commentaires
PassifloraPassiflora    Jeu, 20/09/2012 - 06:52

this is really a hard German song for translation, because it plays around with some German double meanings and slang. I would suggest the following improvements
so muss man trinken -> you have to drink, as the German man is here not in the meaning of man it is a more general speech to everybody
Wenn ich mein Schatz-> does not men treasure in this context it means sweatheart
Wenn ich mein Schatz nicht rufen darf,-> I would write if I am not allowed to call my sweatheart
Warum sollt sie's nit werden,-> has a meaning like why should'nt she be mine
Ich hab' sie ja so gern-> is more I love her so much
Sie hat zwei blaue Äugelein,-> she has two blue eyes, Äugelein is German slang which means indeed small eyes, but it is also often used to say that the yes are nice, so you could also say she has two sweet blue eyes
Sie hat zwei rote Wängelein-> here it is just the same like with the eyes you could say cheeks or sweet cheeks
I think 'Redder" is something that does not really exist in English, I would write here: much more red than wine

Kind regards,

Passiflora

ScieraSciera    Jeu, 20/09/2012 - 10:36
5

Really good Regular smile It's songs like that where you really need a native speaker of at least the target language to get it done properly.
I like how you managed to make it sound as archaic as in the original.

Only thing I don't understand: "freshets". According to dictionaries, a "freshet" is an abundance or a flood, a highwater. The german line doesn't make that much sense but I'd rather translate it as "when all the fountains/wells are (over)flowing" (the "over" isn't given but since a well cannot flow this is what has to be meant. Or it refers to wellsprings. But then it doesn't overflow here but just flow).

fulicaseniafulicasenia    Mar, 25/09/2012 - 01:59

I'll admit, I used 'freshets' just for the alliteration Wink smile But you have to think of it as that season in the spring when the snow melts, and in the foothills all the little springs and waterfalls that were dry or just a trickle all winter, are suddenly gushing forth.

PassifloraPassiflora    Ven, 21/09/2012 - 10:01

I really like your translation :). When I saw the lyrics of this old German song I thought this is really tough and I wanted to see the translation! Congrats

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