Na begeru bezymyannoj reki (На берегу безымянной реки) (अंग्रेज़ी में अनुवाद)

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Na begeru bezymyannoj reki (На берегу безымянной реки)

Мы будем жить с тобой
В маленькой хижине
На берегу очень дикой реки.
Никто и никогда, поверь,
Не будет обиженным
На то, что когда-то покинул пески.
 
На берегу очень дикой реки,
На берегу этой тихой реки.
В дебрях чужих у священной воды,
В теплых лесах безымянной реки.
 
Движенья твои очень скоро станут плавными,
Походка и жесты осторожны и легки.
Никто и никогда не вспомнит самого главного
У безмятежной и медленной реки.
 
На берегу очень дикой реки,
На берегу этой тихой реки.
В дебрях чужих у священной воды,
В теплых лесах безымянной реки.
 
И если когда-нибудь случится беда
Найди верный камень, там где скалы у реки.
Прочти то, что высекла холодная вода,
Но ты эту тайну навсегда сбереги.
 
На берегу очень дикой реки,
На берегу этой тихой реки.
В дебрях чужих у священной воды,
В теплых лесах безымянной реки.
 
хатишахатиша द्वारा बुध, 26/09/2012 - 17:36 को जमा किया गया
आख़िरी बार शनि, 09/11/2019 - 11:18 को Sophia_Sophia_ द्वारा संपादित
अंग्रेज़ी में अनुवादअंग्रेज़ी (metered, rhyming)
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Down by the riverside

संस्करण: #1#2
We're going to live with you
Down by the riverside,
In this small cabin which stands on the bank.
Believe me that not a single soul
Would feel the resentment [inside]
That they once had left their abode in the sands.
 
REFRAIN:
Right on the bank of that very wild creek,
Right on the bank of that very calm creek.
Hidden in shrubs by the sacred blue pools,
Warmed by the woods of the nameless wild creek.
 
Your movements quite soon would become smooth and effortless,
Your swagger and gestures would be wary and ease.
And not a soul ever would recall the most precious
Down by the bank of this serene flowing creek.
 
REFRAIN
 
And if one bad day a misfortune would come,
You’d search for the pebble by the cliffs of the creek.
Please read what cold waters on its surface had cut,
And this very secret you forever must keep.
 
REFRAIN
 
© Schnurrbrat
Critique is always welcomed (proof-read or not, negative too).
SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat द्वारा गुरु, 07/11/2019 - 23:34 को जमा किया गया
लेखक के कमेन्ट:

I'm not sure about this [inside] rhyme yet.

कमेन्ट
IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 08/11/2019 - 04:52

I am not going to deny that my English grammar sucks, but IMHO;
Hid by the shrubs of the sacred blue pools, —> shouldn’t it be “hidden”
Warmed by the woods of the nameless wild creek.

And not a soul ever would recall the most precious
Down by the bank of this serene flowing creek. —> I think I know what are trying to say here, because I understand the original, but it really sounds like one sentence - “no one will recall the most precious down”, the one they spend by the bank
Regular smile

IMHO:
‘The most precious’ is an adjective and requires an object (or subject, ask Bro about logistics), i.e. ‘the most precious one’

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 08/11/2019 - 05:22

Hi, I agree with both and actually had the same thoughts before publishing. I don't know why I did this. I'm mostly on the run lately.
"Hid" could be used in "he hid something"; so it is likely a transitive verb or something like that.
I thought of "Hidden in shrubs by the sacred blue pools" as well.
Re: "precious down" - I was considering placing a comma there, but it will not solve the missing noun problem. However, one could use adjective without a noun (or instead of the one). It's called noun ellipsis. or eclipses. whatever. Hopefully, it is still possible (with a comma or ";" at the end). I need some rhymes though, I can't end everything on the "creek".
Edit: I don't think that punctuation marks will help there ^. I will think of something tomorrow.
Thanks for input.