Voennaya pesnya (Военная песня) (अंग्रेज़ी में अनुवाद)

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अंग्रेज़ी में अनुवादअंग्रेज़ी (metered, poetic)
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The War Song

The sunset glowed like ammo rounds,
And Death was busy with his harvest.
The fight’s tomorrow; and for now,
The first platoon digs in in clouds,
Towards the col they had departed.
 
REFRAIN:
No talking in formation!
Uphill and push ahead!
These peaks are our salvation:
They’ll give a helping hand!
 
Before the war you scaled same walls
Together with a German climber.
He took a fall, but he was saved;
But he, perhaps, prepares today
His machine gun ahead of fighting.
 
REFRAIN
 
You came again, you are alert:
And you await a cherished message.
And your old pal – he’s there as well,
Along with troops from Edelweiss1,
They occupied a point of vantage!
 
REFRAIN
 
Our squad keeps climbing on the ice;
For now, your climbing pal is silent.
We yearn for this attack bright-eyed,
But alpine troops from Edelweiss
Today are far from their finest…
 
REFRAIN
 
  • 1. The 1st Mountain Division of the German Wehrmacht during World War II used Edelweiss insignia (an alpine flower). It quickly earned a nickname of Edelweiss Division. See author's comments for more information.
धन्यवाद!
5 बार धन्यवाद मिला
© Schnurrbrat
Critique is always welcomed (proof-read or not, negative too).
SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat द्वारा शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 00:44 को जमा किया गया
लेखक के कमेन्ट:

This song is about WW2 Battle of the Caucasus. Vysotsky describes events which took place from the summer of 1942 to the beginning of 1943. Germany succeeded in taking control of the main mountain passes of the Central Caucasus, thanks to the actions of 1st Mountain Division of Wehrmacht. It was an elite formation, consisting mostly of Bavarians, well familiar with mountaineering and prepared for war at elevation. They carried insignia of Edelweiss, an alpine flower and a symbol of mountaineering by itself. Edelweiss was also chosen as a name for German military operation to cut off Soviet troops from the oil fields of Baku, Azerbaijan.

German advancement was opposed by the regular troops of the 46th Army of the Soviet Union. 1st Mountain Division took control not only of the key mountain passes but have raised (and filmed) German flags on the summit of Mt. Elbrus (5,642 m). The tides of war changed when 46th Army was reinforced by NKVD soldiers as well as Soviet mountaineers, who in the winter of 1943 regain control of the area and took down German flags from Mt. Elbrus.

Vysotsky deviates from the original meter, introducing two dactyl lines in the end of the first stanza. Translator chose to keep the same meter throughout the song.

Voennaya pesnya (Военная песня)

"Voennaya pesnya ..." के अन्य अनुवाद
अंग्रेज़ी M, PSchnurrbrat
Collections with "Voennaya pesnya ..."
कमेन्ट
IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 06:03

digs in in clouds - это опечатка или так и надо?

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 15:09

Так надо. Партия приказала.

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 16:26

Да, были такие подозрения. Но они же закапываются в облака (dig into), a не окапываются (dig in), закутавшись в облака/запутавшись в облаках (in clouds без артикля).
☺️

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 17:14

Если хотите быть совсем точной, то "взвод зарывался в облака"
зарываться (значения):
1. погружаться, прятаться во что-либо сыпучее, рыхлое; закапываться.
2 . перен. прятать лицо, голову во что-либо мягкое.
3. перен., разг. полностью отдаваться какому-либо делу, занятию, забывая об окружающем.

Я бы хотел использовать именно это выражение с "in in" и склоняюсь к его использованию без артикля.

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 17:40

Вы упустили по крайней мере ещё одно значение глагола «зарываться»:
Не рассчитав своих сил, возможностей, прав, слишком далеко зайти в чём-нибудь

Но здесь вопрос не о русском значении, а об английской интерпретации. Look, I understand your “in in” because I know what does it mean in Russian. But if I would see something like this in let’s say French to English translation, I would most definitely ask what does “in in” mean?

No offense, no arguing, just friendly chat 🙏🏻

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 17:47

Regardless of the source language or its use int the translation or not, the expression "digs in in", utilizes the first "in" as a part of the verb and 2nd "in" as a preposition.
So it is a verb followed by a preposition, that's normal, what's the problem?

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 17:52

“In in” is the problem, it’s not normal

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:30
Igeethecat wrote:

“In in” is the problem, it’s not normal

It's normal, part of the language.
I've posted a couple of YT link from major TV outlets using this expression in their headlines.
Google up "digs in in" and you will find thousands uses of this phrase, including in major publications, books, etc.
"112th Regt, Ch 38th Div, digs in in current positions in N Burma,"

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:03

The problem is twofold:
1) It's a very awkward expression, which would probably not be utilized by a fluent speaker due to availability of better options.
2) It doesn't quite hold the same connotation you think it does. Splitting the expression up, you get 2 parts "digs in", which specifies the action, and "in clouds", which specifies the location. Ignoring the idiomatic implications of "dig in", here you run into the difference between "in" and "into" - two distinct words that both translate to "в" in Russian. So your translation here is more an equivalent to "вкапывается (во что?) в облаках", not "зарывается в облака".

As for the examples you provided - not the same use case. "In defense of", "in New York", "in light of", other examples like "in X days" - these are all valid examples because these are separate, and working, phrases on their own. Here, you're looking for the specific sentiment "into", not "in in".

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 17:46

Wah actually I'd agree here, "in in" is very awkward and usually you use "into" in such cases.

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:03

42, не сердитесь, мы сюда не драться пришли
In-in it is! Long live the in-in!

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:11

Hmm I'll try to break it down a bit better to explain the difference, if "in/into" doesn't help.
Example 1: "Clinton campaign digs in in New York"
Clinton campaign does what? Digs in. Where? In New York.
Example 2: "Merkel's Government Digs In In Light Of Upcoming Election"
Merkel's government does what? Digs in. For what occasion? In light of upcoming election.

Your use case: "The first platoon digs in in clouds"
The first platoon does what? Digs in. Where? In clouds.
The sentiment you're looking for is "into", as in: "Into what? The clouds."
(Взвод зарывался куда? В облака.
and not
Взвод зарывался где? В облаках.)

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:27

Kyu, I would agree that the discussed line has a meaning of "Взвод зарывался где? В облаках.)" rather than "Взвод зарывался куда? В облака."
But I can't agree that "phrasal verb-in + in (preposition)" structure is awkward or should be avoided.
We already had a similar discussion with "off of" in one of my translations.

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:30

It's not awkward due to the combination of "in in" - there are many very valid examples where it works perfectly well. The awkwardness comes from the fact that in this instance, "in" is grammatically the wrong word to use; a native speaker expects "into", so it adds a layer of clunkiness over the inaccurate meaning. ^^

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:52

To sum up:
If we dig in into some object, we use "into", if we dig in somewhere, we use "in" to specify where exactly:
"112th Regt, Ch 38th Div, digs in in current positions in N Burma, since all efforts to advance have been futile and costly. "
United States Army in World War II: Special Studies, Chronology, 1941-1945 by Kent Roberts Greenfield.
And it is not the only example by the native speakers(s)

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:01

Yes, and this shows precisely why you are wrong: the clouds are the object being dug into, not the location.

The construction is not universally correct - we don't say "get in in the car", we say "get into the car"; we don't say "climb in in the vessel", we say "climb into the vessel".

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:47

Взвод зарывался в облака — метафора
Они в гору поднимаются, там облака близко, но у них ещё есть военно-секретная миссия - подкрасься незаметно
Поэтому они в облака вкапываются (сапёрной лопаткой)
Ну или норку там роют

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:51

Which is why a native speaker would be using "buries themselves in" instead of "digs into" in this case anyway)) But that's a different issue entirely...

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:58

Are you kidding me? “buries themselves in‘?

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:20

Я вас в своё завещание запишу
Lol, unironically

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:25

Bold of you to assume I will outlive you at this rate))

IgeethecatIgeethecat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:37

Bold of you to assume I am still alive at this rate Teeth smile

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:40

I don't think you can get a will notarized posthumously...please endure!

Pinchus ZelenogorskyPinchus Zelenogorsky    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:22

Мой словарик с военной четкостью сообщает, что "закопаться" это:
1) bury oneself
2) (воен.) dig oneself in

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:55

well, so far we didn't discuss accuracy of the translation, we're trying to clear out if it is grammatically correct or not.

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 18:56

It's not grammatically correct ^^

Pinchus ZelenogorskyPinchus Zelenogorsky    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:04

Мне тоже так кажется. Зарываются скорее куда, чем где. Еще лучше - во что. В облака. Как в норку.

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:22

Look, we already are going in circles.
I've presented a number of examples from undisputed sources where exactly same structure is used:

SUBJECT digs in in LOCATION(proper or common noun).

How is my phrase different to be called grammatically incorrect?
The first platoon digs in in clouds.

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:29

To quote again:

kyucat wrote:

Yes, and this shows precisely why you are wrong: the clouds are the object being dug into, not the location.

The construction is not universally correct - we don't say "get in in the car", we say "get into the car"; we don't say "climb in in the vessel", we say "climb into the vessel".

"Clouds" is not a location.

Besides, in both examples provided, "digs in" is used metaphorically.

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:40
kyucat wrote:

Which is why a native speaker would be using "buries themselves in" instead of "digs into" in this case anyway)) But that's a different issue entirely...

From: https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/dig-in
Dig in 2. PHRASAL VERB
When soldiers dig in or dig themselves in, they dig trenches and prepare themselves for an attack by the enemy. The battalion went directly to the airport to begin digging in.
The enemy must be digging themselves in now ready for the attack. Our forces are dug in along the river.

kyucatkyucat    शुक्र, 21/02/2020 - 19:41

Mm, absolutely, except trenches are not commonly dug in clouds.