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Yes, I can forgive you

I could have forgiven you,
But for the absence of your fault.
It would have been easier to scream at you,
But for the streaming tears' salt.
 
번역

Ja, ich kann dir vergeben

Ich hätte dir vergeben können
Aber nur weil du unschuldig bist
Es wäre einfacher gewesen, dich anzuschreien
Wenn nicht all das Salz der Tränen, die mir in die Augen strömten, gewesen wäre
 
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BlackSea4everBlackSea4ever    月, 30/11/2020 - 00:03

Aver! danke schön & спасибо! All of you spoiled me today!

IovaIova
   月, 30/11/2020 - 14:40

Не за что!
It's always nice and a pleasure to see and translate lovely poems!

IovaIova
   月, 12/04/2021 - 18:22

Hallo, Andrea, please note that I always write the titles in capital letters, no matter the language, but I'll admit that in German, it sounds a bit tricky for German natives, fixed now.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    月, 12/04/2021 - 18:29

Title orthography errors happen so often that I myself don't always bother correcting them because at times even when I do correct them, they never get corrected. However at the end of the day, it is crucial to adhere to proper title orthography rules in the language you are translating to. Especially German. So I'm glad you fixed the title.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    月, 12/04/2021 - 18:33

I would also do what [@Flopsi] did, which was to remove "Aber nur". It doesn't belong there in my opinion.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    月, 12/04/2021 - 18:35

My pleasure. Your translation is much better now.

BlackSea4everBlackSea4ever    土, 10/04/2021 - 17:29

Guys, be gentle. No low star ratings! Whatever someone felt about my ramblings and expressed in their translations is acceptable. Don't forget I’m not a poet...lol, when in doubt, Alex’s emoji above, will set you straight. 😉

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    月, 12/04/2021 - 18:19

I completely get where you’re coming from but we need to be honest here. None of us ever mean to be hurtful.

BlackSea4everBlackSea4ever    土, 10/04/2021 - 17:40

Ah, but you could have used PM, no? Discuss the meaning and translation, even might have made suggestions...
Just saying this because I’m aggravated that someone blocked me and I cannot tell them of a line that bothers me. I even considered doing it in a forum or on the parallel translation, but decided it wasn’t worth the aggravation to both of us.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    土, 10/04/2021 - 17:42

We’re going to have to respectfully agree to disagree. But I am sorry that someone blocked you for no reason. In any case I don’t ever mean to hurt anyone’s feelings.

FlopsiFlopsi
   土, 10/04/2021 - 17:56

I've rated this translation for a couple of reasons.
First - all German translations by Smight are clinging to much to the word and distort the meaning. The English translations by Smight are much, much better.
Second - there is no capitalization in German titles.
Third - the last line looks like Google Translate. "But for" is not "aber für", it's "wenn nicht... gewesen wäre"

Really 3 stars is a low rating? I've got once 3 stars and I deserved it. 3 stars say "so-so. There are some errors, author should improve."

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    土, 10/04/2021 - 18:07

Flopsi pretty much got everything covered here. However I do want to suggest that you don’t automatically translate obscure sounding expressions literally. Know or find out what they mean by doing some research and/or asking around and then you can go from there.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    土, 10/04/2021 - 18:05

On another note, the original poem is excellent.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    土, 10/04/2021 - 18:27

Ok haha but seriously I really like your poem.

Radu RobertRadu Robert    土, 10/04/2021 - 18:23

Sorry for intrudin in this chat .. but i couldn't help it . My 2 cents opp is that one can't really rate an poem translation low .. just because poetry in its nature isn't destinated to be done word by word .. (as literal as posible) . good ex of that would be Shakespeare poems .. that are only to be adapted and not translaterd , as many others are filled with metaphors .. figurative lines etc The thing is simple .. a low rating would be give (mainly in poetry adaptation) only if the translation lacks completely any sense or if it deviates way too far ( like completely changes and re writes the original poem line by line like i've seen for example many poems from english to romanian posted here on the site that were a complete re write of the original and somehow another poems on their own without any relation with the original meaning/lines). If a person bends a line or even more from a poem .. i think it isn't a good reason enough to rate it low but rather to see if the person did it well and ask the reasons or seek to find them .

Finally .. in poetry adaptation one can only but hope, and do their best to convey the original poem meaning but to do that of course some poems requires a lil\ distorsion in the words to be present and a lil' non /not so literal approach .. If Even the author of this beautiful poem said so .. that she is ok with someone takin an more personal approach on her poem .. i really don't see a reason for low ratings . @Andrea maybe you'll reconsider .. idk is just an point of view .. i've tried to bring also some arguments but that's my all (you know we're not on the same page on what translatin means .. and i'm not an fan of literal /word by word translation .. although i'm not "racist" either and i say that sometimes ( in music mostly ) you just don't have another way .. and words are just words ..with nothing to add and no in behind meaning yet poetry is another thing ..)

FlopsiFlopsi
   月, 12/04/2021 - 19:20

If you knew German you would have understood. This was NOT about me not liking the translation - before it got changed it had just been wrong. And don't be mislead. BlackSea4ever ain't capable to judge if a German translation is really good.

And once again a C is not a bad grade, though it's not good either. Same with 3 stars.
I only reconsidered my vote because it had been improved twice and it was me that pointed out all the flaws.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    月, 12/04/2021 - 19:28
Radu RobertRadu Robert    月, 12/04/2021 - 20:37

My original comment was based on what Andrea commented/gave as aotivation for her rating. Quote "I've rated this translation for a couple of reasons.
First - all German translations by Smight are clinging to much to the word and distort the meaning" So after reading that I just felt the need to say my opinion about how you can t really have the pretention from someone that translates poetry to not clinge on the words , or even present some distorsiona here and there ... Simply because poetry is t like a movie text that one would and can do it word by word ..there are so many metaphors to adapt .. abstract contrast etc ..

But to conclude this ..(cause I really can t seea reason for it to go on ) ...after all, I ve seen that the author of this translation accepted that there s room to improve their work and made some changes and you both made it clear that it wan t just the case of a rating given/based on some line bending or contextual interpr things are pretty clear now ...I personally said only my opp and gave some arguments, (somehow mislead beIN by an earlier comment) and you all helped this person to improve his translation .. so yeahh all,'s peachy and fine ... Glad to see the German community helping each other .. also the Russian com is very nice, active and help one another .. just wished my community would ve been more of the same .. but yeah another topic ...

FlopsiFlopsi
   日, 18/04/2021 - 12:06

It's okay to stick to the words but not if it distorts the meaning. I've read other German translation of smight and didn't know what it's about until I read the English translation.

GeborgenheitGeborgenheit    月, 12/04/2021 - 19:11