[@Lets Chill Page]
Some minor edits/suggestions:
"It would be a beautiful day, / and there aren't so much."
> "It would be a beautiful day, / and there aren't so many." (days can be counted, hence the "many" here)
"I was sometimes afraid / You really forget me."
> "I was sometimes afraid / You would really forget me."
"You have on my mood / still annoying effects."
> "gênants" might be better expressed as "embarrassing" here - maybe "You have on my mood / embarrasing effects, still."
"Each one goes its own way / with what one gave him"
> "Each one goes its own way / with what was given to him" (would emphasize the "donné" component from the original text)
"Everything is so complicate"
> "Everything is so complicated" (typo)
"It's just continuity."
> might be better expressed as "One simply goes on"? (maybe?)
' hope this helps (:
- Torp
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