Haktan Gelen Şerbeti (превод на енглески)

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Haktan Gelen Şerbeti

Haktan gelen şerbeti
İçtik elhamdülillah
İçtik elhamdülillah
 
şol kudret denizini
Geçtik elhamdülillah
Geçtik elhamdülillah
 
Kuru idik yaş olduk
Ayak idik baş olduk
Havalandık kuş olduk
Uçtuk elhamdülillah
 
Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
 
Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
 
Şu karşıki dağları
Yemyeşil bağları
Elhamdülillah
Geçtik elhamdülillah
 
Sağlık sefalık ile
Aştık elhamdülillah
Geçtik elhamdülillah
 
Vardığımız illere
şol sefa gönüllere
Halka Taptuk manisin
Saçtık elhamdülillah
 
Dirildik pınar olduk
İrkildik ırmak olduk
Aktık denize dolduk
Aktık elhamdülillah
 
Beri gel barışalım
Yad isen bilişelim
Atımız eyerlendi
Eştik elhamdülillah
 
Elhamdülillah
Göçtük elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
 
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
 
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah
 
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
Elhamdülillah, Elhamdülillah
 
Поставио/ла: architectonicarchitectonic У: Понедељак, 11/02/2019 - 09:17
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превод на енглески (poetic)

Nectar of Truth

We drank essence of the Truth
drank it Glory to Allah
drank it Glory to Allah
 
We passed the sea of Might
passed it Glory to Allah
passed it Glory to Allah
 
While dry we became wet
While a foot we became a head
Took to the skies became a bird
And gained flight Glory to Allah
 
Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
 
Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
 
The Mountains over there
with the vibrant vineyards
Glory to Allah
passed through Glory to Allah
 
Safe and Sound
We cut across and
over the pass Glory to Allah
 
we arrived to settle in cities
bringing peace to our very being
the golden rule taught to every being
we did it Glory to Allah
 
we came to life became a spring
Swerved and became a river
We ran became a sea
overflowed Glory to Allah
 
Come here let’s make peace
go from stranger to fellowship
dude our horses became mates too
now we're bolting Glory to Allah
 
Glory to Allah
We migrated Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah
 
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
 
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
 
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
Glory to Allah, Glory to Allah
 
Поставио/ла: architectonicarchitectonic У: Понедељак, 11/02/2019 - 10:27
Last edited by architectonicarchitectonic on Среда, 20/02/2019 - 08:17
Коментари аутора:

it seems this poem was inspired by evolution of life on our planet

The author of translation requested proofreading.
It means that he/she will be happy to receive corrections, suggestions etc about the translation.
If you are proficient in both languages of the language pair, you are welcome to коментариши.
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Коментари
kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 07:19

kuru-yaş kısmı dry-wet olmayacak sanki, ama uygun kelimeyi de bulamadım. bitkilerin yeşermesiyle alakalı. bir de nakarat kısımları dahil hepsini yazarsan (copy paste yapabilirsin) site çeviriyle asıl metni daha kolay okunabilecek bir şekilde hizalıyor, hoş oluyor.

architectonicarchitectonic    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 07:53

benim dushuncem chevriyi "while dry we became wet" yaptim chunku "sea of might" onceki satirda dile gelir... bir de bitkileri chok dushunmedim chunku ileridei ki satirlarda bitki falan dile gelir "daglar....yemyeshil baglar...elhamdullilah" diye.

benim ilginch gordugum shey chronology as it pertains to the general idea of evolution of life on this planet....lol it maybe silly but it makes sense "while dry we became wet" is invoking the image of the primordial soup ...then "ayak iken bash oldum" sonra "havalndim kush oldum" bunlar bir shey belirtiyor insan tarihi/gelshmesi ve the development of life in general

these are just ideas i'm not saying youre completely wrong bc both bitki de olsa yash olur ...yash olmak su altina kalmaktir...ve ilk hayat denizlerde zaten bitki gibi sheyler...sonra ayak as in foot bence ve englishce snail ayaktir ama once ayak vardi sonra octopus gibe bash denilen shey... sonra avalanan baliklar da var these fish glide in the air for a long distance...still around these days i think ...so yeah that my long winded response ...i'm sorry for the turglish

bir de unutacaktim insan tarihine and the idea of becoming community is ahead in the poem... in settling cities and domesticating horses even... bence he ends it with gochtuk elhamdulillah chunku insan tarihinde hep gochmek var

kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 11:56

well it reminded me of plants getting green in the spring as someone who is familiar with these kind of poetry, but I cannot name a certain reason why. so your translation is not wrong as well.
btw, you know that 'taptuk' there is the teacher of yunus emre, right? I realised that you translated that part in a weird way. actually it has some missing letterss because its an old poem, that line is actually like 'halka taptuk manisini saçtık' but it said manisin. so it's not 'you're an enigma', its like... words of taptuk

architectonicarchitectonic    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 23:29

thats true manisin is more like "you're a riddle" manileri chozmek lazim ondan enigma dedim

kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 21:25

maniyi bilmece ile karıştırıyor olabilir misin? mani 4 dizelik kısa bir tür şiire denir
mani = engel = مانع is different though
it doesnt say sen manisin 'you're mani', it says 'mani of taptuk' (taptuk manisini) but the last letter is gone, because this is an old poem

architectonicarchitectonic    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 21:58

"mani 4 dizelik kısa bir tür şiire denir" yup...the english word "meaning" is rooted in the word mani bc maninin manasi var you have to find the meaning in it. so taptuk manisi would be something like a parable of some sort with a lesson packed into it.

it doesnt say sen manisin 'you're mani' thats right... i took the liberty but left it at you're an enigma... also i wasnt aware beside taptuk being yunus teacher it(taptuk) has also gained a meaning as T C was pointing out. so that might go into how that verse ends up... but if i find a good way to translate it ... true to the original "Halka Taptuk manisin
Saçtık elhamdülillah"

kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 12:03

and eştik is not a noun, its the verb eşmek, but I'm not sure about how to translate it
maybe its wrong here, I'll check some other sources

architectonicarchitectonic    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 23:42

so eshmek is related to the word ashirmak somehow?

architectonicarchitectonic    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 21:56

i found a different version of yunus poem too i think what i need to do is buy Yunus Emre;Halman, Talat Sait bc there are several variations floating around.
however this performance by christopher tin is what is posted here in turkish. i listened to carefully there was one spot with a small variation of the word. i'll have to look up the exact spot.

kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 22:38

well yunus emre is the original poet, but he didnt write them down I guess. maybe thats why there are a couple of versions. so I would take the more meaningfull one as reference

kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 22:42

omg, I've just listened the audio
whatever, maybe you should change this as 'christopher tin version' and we can add the other version to yunus emre

architectonicarchitectonic    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 23:27

its been a long time since school but if i recall correctly wasnt yunus emre poem updated to something closer to modern turkish?

Beri gel barışalım yad isen bilişelim
Atımız eğerlendi estik elhamdulillah
İndik Rum'u kışladık çok hayır şer işledik
Uş bahar geldi geri göçtük

its interesting line and i vaguely recall hearing "İndik Rum'u kışladık çok hayır şer işledik" before ..but what makes sense is what TC said about eshmek to be "uzerinde hizlica gecmek". bc we can see how eshmek turns to estik'e. (ruzgar gibi hizlica esmek) estik is used.

we can see how imdi became shimdi so you can go from eshmek to esmek in a change of dialect

kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 23:41

no, yunus emre poems are usually close to today's turkish except some words. so they can be easily understood. still, there are some simplified versions but this doesnt seem to be one of them
and esmek has nothing to do with either eşmek or aşmak or aşırmak. they are all different. I dont know what nazlı talks about but eşmek doesnt mean üzerinden hızlıca geçmek. just check tdk if you dont believe me

architectonicarchitectonic    Четвртак, 14/02/2019 - 01:54

yea but youre ignoring the fact the version you pointed to says exactly that. uses the word estik instead of eshtik there is precedence to words losing a letter or gaining a vowel as they travel west. some dialect says yagmur other says ya(g)mur

and youre ignoring the example where the word shimdi used to be imdi... so eshtik to estik isnt a far leap at least shouldnt be to anyone familiar with turkish

i'm certain yunus poems were standardized to be better understood not all of them and not all the words but there was definitely some standardization of his poems ...the reason it stuck with me is yunus poetry helped set a standard for ottoman turkish.

kertenkelesuratlikertenkelesuratli    Четвртак, 14/02/2019 - 07:35

check tdk and some ethimologic dictionary if you wanna learn more, I will not discuss you about this because its not going anywhere. but I'm pretty sure that they are different and one of them is wrong. since christopher is not turkish, I'd say the wrong version is this one. whatever, have a good day

architectonicarchitectonic    Четвртак, 14/02/2019 - 07:42

yea i get it but this one is a translation of whats on his record. so youre right no need to discuss it further. it is what it is...i'm not gonna change this bc this belongs to this version. but i should definitely buy a book of saits scholarly translations of these poems and maybe work on it... who knows even if a select few come out better... i'm cool with it

architectonicarchitectonic    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 07:59

"With health and serenity
We cut across and went
through the passage
Glory to Allah"

this definitely needs a better word maybe two for a proper translation of saglik

T C Nazli VolkanT C Nazli Volkan    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 12:29

Halka Taptuk>Baba Taptuk manisin
Saçtık elhamdülillah
Taptuk(toptug) irade sahibi, eline-diline-beline hakim kisi, nefsine hakim, yaptigi islerde durust-kibar-anlayisli olan demek.

T C Nazli VolkanT C Nazli Volkan    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 12:41

kudret denizi> gogun ucuncu kati. nefs terbiyesi goren (gercek) tarikat ehlinin gectigi bir mertebe. Aslinda bu siirin tercumesini tarikat islerinden anlayan kisilerin yapmasi cok daha iyi olur. Nitekim bu siirde bahsedilen ne deniz, ne dag, ne dere, ne baglar bahceler bizim anladigimiz manadaki fiziksel seyler degiller. Hep ruhlar alemindeki olgularin imleri her biri.

architectonicarchitectonic    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 01:22

hehe "ne baglar bahceler bizim anladigimiz manadaki fiziksel seyler degiller. Hep ruhlar alemindeki olgularin imleri her biri." belki. these have many layers of meaning thats for sure and i also feel it would be counterproductive to ignore the obvious which is the poem is definitely about Creation and so it should be translated and or interpreted with that in mind.

architectonicarchitectonic    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 00:06

"Aslinda bu siirin tercumesini tarikat islerinden anlayan kisilerin yapmasi cok daha iyi olur" malesef bizimkilerde ilgisizlik var ...ben mystic sufi degilim and i'd hardli say elimden gelen bukadar ...bende de ilgisizlik ve tembellik var Sad smile

architectonicarchitectonic    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 08:06

i've been thinking about it "tarikat islerinden anlayan" might not be the best thing although it wouldnt hurt to have some spirituality. interesting thing to ponder since records came out all the performance of recited poetry is trying to stick with the standard the way we recite these poems havent changed for a very long time. you can test on youtube and every artist singing it is always trying to keep it "as is" very little even experimenting on the instrumental or melody part of it...(why i found this video very interesting it breaks from the standard) they always sound basically the same. i guess my argument is "tarikat islerinden anlayan" wouldnt be rebellious enough to look at it with fresh eyes. i'm far from being as eloquent as coleman barks but i think he's done wonderful with his versions of rumis poetry

T C Nazli VolkanT C Nazli Volkan    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 12:33

Haktan gelen şerbeti
İçtik elhamdülillah> We drunk the (spriritual) sherbet bestowed upon us by the Lord Almighty; praise is to Him. Cumlesine yakin bir cumle olsa iyi olur. (kelime secimi sana ait. daha uygun kelimelerle de yazabilirsin ancak boyle nir mana var cumlede.)

T C Nazli VolkanT C Nazli Volkan    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 12:59

Kuru idik yaş olduk> We were dried out but now we become lash
Ayak idik bash olduk> We were the mare feet but now we became the masters
Havalandık kuş olduk>By becoming birds, we soared up into the skies and flown; praises to the Lord Almighty.
Uçtuk elhamdülillah

Şu karşıki dağları> The mountains that were facing us
Yem-yeşil bağları> The very-lash bocages
Elhamdülillah> Praises be to the Lord Almighty
Geçtik elhamdülillah> We have now passed.

architectonicarchitectonic    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 23:38

"Kuru idik yaş olduk> We were dried out but now we become lash" ama yalnish analama gelir.. kuru idik ...kurutulduk degil but dried out implies that the object was wet and then "hung" to dry then made wet again.

KökbüreKökbüre    Субота, 23/02/2019 - 02:12

Nothing dries by itself. There is always a cause for it.

architectonicarchitectonic    Субота, 23/02/2019 - 04:39

sure it does if it starts off as dry then it doesnt get dried out lol no but seriously dry, thirsty, blind, dead and term such as these arent meant literally & only literally...thirsty for wisdom not water, coming to life these are all symbolic. however in this specific poem we can't ignore the GRAIN its written in(creation). its about creation so whether something was dried or dry is just semantics ESPECIALLY if there is language about sea and taking flight he even literally uses becoming a bird(that is evolution he is talking about in creation)...there is a double meaning there that the tarikat masters brushed under the rug bc their understanding was limited but ego the size of pres djt....we can see this in how muslim world forgot they had discovered pluto, as it is depicted in ulu cami mimber built in 1300's....lets not contribute in obscuring the many dimensions of meaning in the poem itself. we have to put aside our cultural biases around these poems in order to see them with new eyes... otherwise these poems will be in the cages their tarikat put them in.

plus lets keep in mind Kuru idik yaş olduk is a very simple sentence not rocket science kuru = dry kurumush = dried kutulmush = dried out. keeping it simple is important

KökbüreKökbüre    Субота, 23/02/2019 - 11:51

I might turn around and say, I'm dried out for, I haven't had a drink for a long tiime. We don't have to be hung out there in the sun to be dried out. It can happen from many other causes. So in the poem when it says Kuruğ edik, it literally means we were dry, however Kuruğ in Turkish also means empty, meaningless, unworthy, lacking essence e.t.c. So, you need to think about the poem as a whole. The (spiritual) sherbet bestowed upon us from God Almighty quenched our thirst and our souls that were dried out became lash anew. You may do a literal translation along with explanation or simply translate the meaning and add literal meaning in the comment box. But, the tranlation you have up there does need a bit of work before it can qualify for a meaningful translation. So, it is dried out. Our souls were dried out and the (spiritual) sherbet God has bestowed on us quenched our thirst (made us again lash).

architectonicarchitectonic    Недеља, 24/02/2019 - 01:29

you can say anything bro...but we have dry counties in u.s. where there is no alcohol sold. these are called dry not dried thats the language i can take the liberty and play with the words but i'm not going to change how english is used. Kuru in Turkish CAN IMPLY empty, meaningless, unworthy, lacking essence it DOESNT mean empty kuru still means dry kurumush/kurutulmush means dot dot dot. in english we have dry humor its used similar to what youre saying...the concept isnt foreign to an english speaker.

YUP "he (spiritual) sherbet bestowed upon us from God Almighty quenched our thirst and our souls that were dried out became lash anew." i agree it just seems like youre married to using the term dried out bc it makes sense to you...and again i'll remind you that this poem has centuries old cultural bias built on the meaning of poems like these...not sure what you dont get about my argument. or about the word kuru being dry not dried. if you just want to talk about the meanings behind these poems thats cool but i'm not interested in caging them in the turkish prisons their tarikat masters put them in PERIOD

architectonicarchitectonic    Понедељак, 25/02/2019 - 08:06

the clinical problem of dry mouth(something wet dried up) is still termed DRY mouth its not dried mouth.

pattern in this is embracing change...always making progress not letting a sea or a mountain or circumstances be an impediment to "ermek" losing ourselves in dry vs. dried we easily miss important lessons relevant to all walks of life...not just those with turkic inclination

architectonicarchitectonic    Среда, 13/02/2019 - 09:49

We drunk the (spriritual) sherbet bestowed upon us by the Lord Almighty; praise is to Him.
so thats not a bad translation however Hakk is an attribute of Allah and it signifies the source of truth and so i used the Truth rather than (spiritual) also sherbet as a drink is foreign in english speaking countries there is sorbet but not sure about using it. hakktan gelen sherbeti bir agua de vida gibi anlamina with a twist bc its not water of immortality as agua de vida implies its of the Turth, which often why "quenching the thirst" is terminology used for prophets. i think the muhammed dogdugu gece has a line about quenching thirst...so i went with water of the Truth or juice of the Truth still doesnt sound right maybe i'll think of a better way

T C Nazli VolkanT C Nazli Volkan    Уторак, 12/02/2019 - 13:13

Vardığımız illere>
şol sefa gönüllere>
Halka Taptuk manisin>
Saçtık elhamdülillah>
We have scattered the teachings of Baba Taptug - which is a joy for the hearts; upon the lands we went to. Praises to the Lord Almighty.