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General

Where are you now, with whom?
Who is ready to blame?
Who does remember every name?
We have run out the themes.
Don't disturb the quiet
In this very dark night.
 
[Refrain]
Where is your uniform, general?
Where are your medals,
Straight back as of metal1?
Haven't you heard the retreat?
No, it's just rain drumming on
your roof, general.
 
Everyone finds the time to go away,
but nobody will quit for good.
Parlementaires2 come one by one.
Each tried the bitter taste of the fruit3.
 
[Refrain]
 
I want to sleep, but room is well-lit
And there's a teapot with tea.
May be tomorrow there'll be sunny morning
and I'll find at last the right key.
 
[Refrain]
 
  • 1. military bearing
  • 2. this French word means heralds, messengers, bearers of flag of truce
  • 3. The meaning is that they all have already experienced the bitter taste of defeat.
Originaltexter

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Låttexter ( ryska)

Kommentarer
Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 00:39

I'm sorry Pinhas, but this isn't very good. In fact, I don't most sentences.

Where are you and with whom? > (Olde English, and incorrect even so) > Where do you come from and with who(m)?
Who wants to be a court? > (Makes NO sense)
Who keeps in mind all the names? > (Makes NO sense)
We haven't discussion theme. > "We haven't discussed the subject"
Can we just be quiet? > "Can't we just be quiet?"
Night is too dark. It rains. > "This rainy night is so dark."

[Refrain]
Where is your coat, general?
Where are your honours? > "Where are your medals?"
Straight back as tight as string1? > (Makes NO sense)
Did you hear a retreat? > "Didn't you hear the (command) to retreat?"
No. Rain's just beating upon
your roof, general.

Everyone takes the time so as to leave, > (Makes no sense) "Everyone takes time to leave" ???
but nobody will leave for good.
Parlamentirians come one by one. > "Ministers of Parliament come one by one"
Each knows the bitter taste of the fruit. > "each knowing the bitter taste of (defeat)."

[Refrain]

I want to sleep but here's the strong tea > I want to sleep, but my tea was too strong
and the room is brighly lit.
May be tomorrow there'll be sunny morning
and I'll find the key to fit. > (Makes no sense)

I'm sorry my friend, but your attempt at rhyming and cadence has failed you this time. :(

PinchusPinchus
   Sön, 14/04/2019 - 01:44

Phil, thank you for attention! Ok, let's correct.
By the way, did you read russian text and understand it? I'm not sure.

>Where are you and with whom?
Author asks his old friends - where are all of them now? and with whom they lives.

>Who wants to be a court?
Who wants to be a judge (court is american synonym, isn't it?)

>Who keeps in mind all the names?
Who remembers all the names of old friend (may be brother-soldiers) - alive and dead

>Can't we just be quiet?
Ok

>We haven't discussion theme.
We have no theme to discuss, we are too different persons

>Night is too dark. It rains.
>Where are your honours?
Do you see some grammatical mistakes?

>Straight back as tight as string
Your back was very straight earlier, not now. Author asks the general: where is you straight back now.

>Did you hear a retreat
retreat is a noun. The signal to retreat.

>Everyone takes the time so as to leave
Each person finds the appropriate time to leave (I don't know, to leave what. military unit? city of birth?)

>Parlamentirians come one by one.
Please, listen song and read russian text. Not ministers. Military parlamentirians.

>Each knows the bitter taste of the fruit.
May be he tells about an apple of Eden, I don't know. This is separate sentence. The verb is "knows"

>I want to sleep but here's the strong tea
There's a hot teapot in the room, so, he can drink the tea and awake, come in "licid mind"

>and I'll find the key to fit
Literally: He will find the correct (apropriate, fitting) key in the keychain. Correct for what? He doesn't explain.

>I'm sorry my friend, but your attempt at rhyming and cadence has failed you this time
Русские не сдаются! I prefer to fight against mistakes.

Treugol'nyTreugol'ny    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 03:03

"parlamentirians" Parlamentarians. Also, where the military parlamentarians come from? Nonsense. They not coming one by one. They leaving one after the other. Where is your tunic( coat is not a "mundir") Is your back as tight as A string? They ask the question. Who wants to be a judge? It's better than "Who wants to be a court?" "and I'll find the key to fit". We are talking here about old general(man) and maybe because his mind not as good as it used to be, he just can't find the key that he needs. A new, sunny day will come and maybe he will find that key. And about Russians don't surrender, it's B.S.
Kind Regards
Anatoli

PinchusPinchus
   Sön, 14/04/2019 - 03:54

Анатолий, давайте по пунктам для ясности:
1. С "парламентерами" - Вы правы, есть ошибка, да и слово не годится. Тут я явно накосячил.
2. Парламентеры не приходят, а уходят. Отлично. Тогда поясните пожалуйста - куда. Я-то полагаю, что те, кто "не уйдут навсегда", они-то и возвращаются в качестве парламентеров, отведав "плода" вне дома.
3. Слово "coat" не подходит для мундира. Фила, однако, это слово не напрягло. Гугловский переводчик предлагает tunic и coat наравне. Еще я нашел "King's coat"
4. Is your back as tight as A string? Тут Вы, конечно, правы. Можно написать
"and back as tight as string" и знак вопроса в предыдущей строке убрать.
Или написать Where's you military build?
5. Слово "court" для судьи не годится. Сошлюсь на источник:
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/court
6. Поиском нужного ключа будем заниматься солнечным утром пожилой генерал. Именно так вы интерпретируете русский текст, серьезно? Тогда Вы сумели сплющить гору в блин, начисто лишив смысла глубокую песню. "Есть там городишко, плоский как блин, и конечно называется "Вершины"" (О.Генри. Вождь краснокожих)
7. B.S. - это Ваше личное суждение. Возможно, именно поэтому парламентеры в п. 2 и идут не в том направлении.
Спасибо!

Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 04:04

>Where are you and with whom?
Author asks his old friends - where are all of them now? and with whom they lives.
>If the author is asking his old friends, then he knows where his old friends are.
The question should be "Where are THEY now, and with who(m)?"

>Who wants to be a court?
Who wants to be a judge (court is american synonym, isn't it?)
>No. A court is normally considered the building (or the entire judicial process). A judge is a judge.
So, "Who really wants to be a judge?"

>Who keeps in mind all the names?
Who remembers all the names of old friend (may be brother-soldiers) - alive and dead
>"Who can remember the names of all of them?"

>We haven't discussion theme.
We have no theme to discuss, we are too different persons.
>"There's nothing for us to talk about." (It gets the same meaning across. = We have nothing in common to talk about.)

>Where are your honours?
Do you see some grammatical mistakes?
>There is no grammar mistake. It's just that it makes no sense. If you say, "Where is your honor?" (You're implying that the person lacks any honor.) If you're talking about "medals", then you have to say so. A medal represents an "honor" bestowed upon someone from someone else.

>Straight back as tight as string
Your back was very straight earlier, not now. Author asks the general: where is you straight back now.
>I have to say that we cannot understand this as written. The best I can suggest is, "Why are you crouched over?"

>Did you hear a retreat
retreat is a noun. The signal to retreat.
>I don't know what this is supposed to mean. "Didn't you hear the other army retreat?" Or "Didn't you hear the command to tell your own army to retreat?" The way you wrote it is ambiguous.

>Everyone takes the time so as to leave
Each person finds the appropriate time to leave (I don't know, to leave what. military unit? city of birth?)
>Everyone leaves at his own discretion (or "time" or "choosing").
>Parlamentirians come one by one.
Please, listen song and read russian text. Not ministers. Military parlamentirians.
I'm sorry but I have NO IDEA what a "parlamentirian" is. It's not a modern word, and I don't speak Shakespeare.

>Each knows the bitter taste of the fruit.
May be he tells about an apple of Eden, I don't know. This is separate sentence. The verb is "knows"
>My best guess is "Everyone tastes bitter fruit from time to time."

>I want to sleep but here's the strong tea
There's a hot teapot in the room, so, he can drink the tea and awake, come in "licid mind"
>"I want to sleep, but there's strong tea here to keep me awake."

>and I'll find the key to fit
Literally: He will find the correct (apropriate, fitting) key in the keychain. Correct for what? He doesn't explain.
>"I'll find the right key."

Русские не сдаются! I prefer to fight against mistakes.
> I never asked you to give up!!! Keep getting better. I don't give up either. :) With help we both will prevail!

PinchusPinchus
   Sön, 14/04/2019 - 15:00

Phil, is it now ok with text?

BratBrat    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 18:46
Phil Ambro wrote:

>Where are you and with whom?
Author asks his old friends - where are all of them now? and with whom they lives.
>If the author is asking his old friends, then he knows where his old friends are.
The question should be "Where are THEY now, and with who(m)?"

Well, the singer is really wondering about where they are (or is - it's not clear out of the context)

Phil Ambro wrote:

>Who wants to be a court?
Who wants to be a judge (court is american synonym, isn't it?)
>No. A court is normally considered the building (or the entire judicial process). A judge is a judge.
So, "Who really wants to be a judge?"

I'd say "Who'd want to be the judge" to match the metre.

Phil Ambro wrote:

>Who keeps in mind all the names?
Who remembers all the names of old friend (may be brother-soldiers) - alive and dead
>"Who can remember the names of all of them?"

"Who does remember all names?" is the closest match.

Phil Ambro wrote:

>We haven't discussion theme.
We have no theme to discuss, we are too different persons.
>"There's nothing for us to talk about." (It gets the same meaning across. = We have nothing in common to talk about.)

And what about "We've run out of themes" ??

Phil Ambro wrote:

>Where are your honours?
Do you see some grammatical mistakes?
>There is no grammar mistake. It's just that it makes no sense. If you say, "Where is your honor?" (You're implying that the person lacks any honor.) If you're talking about "medals", then you have to say so. A medal represents an "honor" bestowed upon someone from someone else.

Medals are much better. :D

Phil Ambro wrote:

>Straight back as tight as string
Your back was very straight earlier, not now. Author asks the general: where is you straight back now.
>I have to say that we cannot understand this as written. The best I can suggest is, "Why are you crouched over?"

Well, if translated idiomatically, it would read smth. like "Where's the ramrod that used to straighten your back?"

Phil Ambro wrote:

>Did you hear a retreat
retreat is a noun. The signal to retreat.
>I don't know what this is supposed to mean. "Didn't you hear the other army retreat?" Or "Didn't you hear the command to tell your own army to retreat?" The way you wrote it is ambiguous.

The original is ambiguous too, I must confess. But I believe it should be "Haven't you heard the retreat?" there.

Phil Ambro wrote:

>Everyone takes the time so as to leave
Each person finds the appropriate time to leave (I don't know, to leave what. military unit? city of birth?)
>Everyone leaves at his own discretion (or "time" or "choosing").
>Parlamentirians come one by one.
Please, listen song and read russian text. Not ministers. Military parlamentirians.
I'm sorry but I have NO IDEA what a "parlamentirian" is. It's not a modern word, and I don't speak Shakespeare.

It's "parlementaires" (heralds, messengers). The word is not so common in Russian, either.

Phil Ambro wrote:

>Each knows the bitter taste of the fruit.
May be he tells about an apple of Eden, I don't know. This is separate sentence. The verb is "knows"
>My best guess is "Everyone tastes bitter fruit from time to time."

The meaning is that they all have already experienced the bitter taste of defeat.

Phil Ambro wrote:

>I want to sleep but here's the strong tea
There's a hot teapot in the room, so, he can drink the tea and awake, come in "licid mind"
>"I want to sleep, but there's strong tea here to keep me awake."

Good point. ;)

Phil Ambro wrote:

>and I'll find the key to fit
Literally: He will find the correct (apropriate, fitting) key in the keychain. Correct for what? He doesn't explain.
>"I'll find the right key."

Good point, especially with the tea-key rhyme.

BTW, Can't we just be quiet -> Do not disturb the calm (it's in the imperative mood)

PinchusPinchus
   Sön, 14/04/2019 - 20:39

Thank you, Brat, excellent!

>I'd say "Who'd want to be the judge" to match the metre.
Judge to "them", to people author asks "Where are you now, with who"

>Who does remember all names // We've run out of themes
I like it. Phil, what do you think?

>The original is ambiguous too, I must confess. But I believe it should be "Haven't you heard the retreat?" there.
General listens the drum roll and can decides that is retreat command (to him, to his army), but it's just a rain.

>It's "parlementaires" (heralds, messengers). The word is not so common in Russian, either.
Ok, parlementaires were rehabilitated, I'll include "them" in the english text.

>Good point, especially with the tea-key rhyme.
It was lit-fit rhyme, I've had to alter to tea-key. After Phil's suggestion.

>BTW, Can't we just be quiet -> Do not disturb the calm (it's in the imperative mood)
And we should rhyme it.

Treugol'nyTreugol'ny    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 04:07

"Все находят время, чтобы уйти"-Everyone knows when the time to go. Be it an old general or politicians. And politicians do leave the place( parliament) one after another. And everyone, who ever was in public service, tasted a bitter fruit of disappointment. Also, your sarcastic remarks, you can shove them, where the sun doesn't shine.

PinchusPinchus
   Sön, 14/04/2019 - 04:28

>Everyone knows when the time to go
Thank you! But not "knows" - finds. I leave the rest without comment.

IgeethecatIgeethecat    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 05:34

Oh, PZ, прислушиваетесь к мнению носителей языка и тех, who is fluent.
Your translation is still full of grammar errors and misinterpreted meaning...

Мундир - maybe Phil can give a native perspective - it’s a mIlitary uniform, higher ranks, but it means more, than just a coat, it’s about valor and honor

Treugol'nyTreugol'ny    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 07:06

"Everyone takes the time so as to leave" Please , explain?

BratBrat    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 18:48

Well, it's not "to leave" but "to quit", I reckon.

Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Sön, 14/04/2019 - 20:59

The term may exist in English. But, I was in the military, and just as in the Russian military, terms associated with "surrender" are not common. LOL. It's not only the Russians who never сдаутся. LOL. Factually, some soldier who has the unfortunate task of carrying the flag of defeat is not commonly given credit in our history books. (And, I doubt in your Russian ones either.) So, for the purposes of "understanding". You should leave out the person, and just use the "white flag". Every American understands that the "white flag" is surrender. There's even a beautiful song about it, but you will NOT find a "parliamentarian" in it.
https://lyricstranslate.com/en/Dido-White-Flag-lyrics.html

PinchusPinchus
   Sön, 14/04/2019 - 21:18

This song ("White Flag") is more close to "Врагу не сдается наш гордый Варяг" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjjeI9zepVA), navy subject.

It was my error to talk about "Русские не сдаются", it's confused us and led to wrong way. Let's guess, "Parlementaires" is just a french word, so I've footnoted it.

About "General" song: "Parlementaires" don't want to capitulate, the want to carry on talk. May be they just want to come back.

What do you think about "We have run out the themes" - Brat's offer

PinchusPinchus
   Sön, 14/04/2019 - 15:07

Перешагни, перескачи,
Перелети, пере- что хочешь -
Но вырвись: камнем из пращи,
Звездой, сорвавшейся в ночи...
Сам затерял - теперь ищи...
Бог знает, что себе бормочешь,
Ища пенсне или ключи.
(В.Ходасевич, "Перешагни, перескачи...")

PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 03:22

Вот эта песня: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fm-ajAIv7q0?
Не вижу ничего общего ни в словах, ни в музыке. Чайф в принципе, на мой взгляд, вторичен. Эта песня музыкально ближе к Nick Cave "Jubilee Street" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QyRFAw5La38), а содержательно - это же совсем не о советских ужасах, она могла бы появиться в любой стране и в любую эпоху. Она о тоске человека, который ищет правильный путь, и поэта, который ищет правильное слово. Я как раз очень люблю ее. Ее, Апрель и еще парочку.
Вообще, если Цоя с кем-то сравнивать, то мне в голову приходит только Кейв.

Что касается Ваших предложений - с благодарностью принимаю
"Straight back as of metal"

Может быть что-то придумаете с корявой рифмой whom-themes? Например "who-two". Мне на английском грамотную фразу не сконструировать, чтобы она заканчивалась "us two", например.

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 03:34
PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 03:36

Спасибо, я вокруг этого потанцую

PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 03:33

Найдите время, послушайте Цоя, уверен, Вы оцените, как будто в первый раз. Его до сих пор перепевают все кому не лень. Не слышали, как Полина Гагарина в Китае спела "Кукушку"?

PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 03:49

А я Вас и не обращаю, просто предлагаю выделить в голове разные полочки для Цоя и Чайфа. Людям, слава богу, не запретишь перепевать чужие песни, помощь в этом деле - одна из наших задач. В версии Гагариной мне нравится пианино. Одна из особенностей Цоя (я уже спустился с кафедры и снял тиару, не волнуйтесь): в его донельзя простых музыке и ритмах скрыт большой потенциал. Такая шарманка с 10 отличными мелодиями. Или музыкальная платформа. Бери и развивай в нужную сторону.

Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 04:38

Catching up, reading all comments, I would like to make one note.

BRAT said...

Well, if translated idiomatically, it would read something like "Where's the ramrod that (you) used to straighten your back?"

OMG! I laughed so hard. I almost peed my pants. Please don't use "ramrod", unless you're using it specifically to mean "a large log that many men are holding to strike a locked castle gate, trying to force it open. Seriously. It is an old term, which we can understand, when used in movies about medieval times mainly in England and France. (The USA is too new a country to have castles.) Using this term in any other context sounds very funny!!!
To me it sounded like a euphonism for a man's penis. Although I don't think many men are clever enough to call their penis a "ramrod". Most probably call their penis "monster" or "Thor", but still. I imagined ten castle guards shoving a ramrod up some guy's ass to straighten out his back. OMG! Thanks for that!!! It was my best laugh of the day!!!

By the way Brat, what's up with "reckon"? You trying to learn our Southern dialect, or are you from Arkansas? JK.

Hugs to all, lemme know if I can help you out any more in this. ;)

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 04:44
Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 05:10

LOL. Yes, I've been to Hearst Castle in death valley. And, if you or anyone considers it a true "castle", I'm sure the Europeans would disagree. BTW if you want to see "London Bridge" you can go to Arizona, USA for that too. ;)

SchnurrbratSchnurrbrat    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 05:12
Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 05:15

OH True!! I blame Ny-Quil. Where the hell is Hearst Castle? I must admit, I've never seen that one. But, I have seen the Castle in Disneyland and Disneyworld's Magic Kingdom. Do they count too? LOL. I think not.

IgeethecatIgeethecat    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 05:20

Hearst Castle is in California. Not even close to medieval European castles, btw

Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 05:21

We Americans love things we don't have. Everyone's like that everywhere! When I was young I had curly hair, and all I wanted was straight hair. Now in my 50s, all I want is ANY hair. LOL.
Europeans want what we have and they don't --- a president with honor, integrity, statesmanship, compassion, wisdom, and... OH, wait! Those times have past... What the hell DO Europeans want?! I have no clue. From what I hear, I guess British want to exit the European Union, and the French want better fire suppression systems in their cathedrals.

Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 05:12

I can still picture ten or more knights trying to shove a ramrod up a guy's ass, trying to straighten out his back. Seems like a Monty Python skit. LMAO. Bubbles in your drink, buddy. As for me, I'm on a strict wine and Ny-Quil diet, because I have the flu.

BratBrat    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 08:10

Вот ещё одно доказательство того, что у американцев все делается через жопу. :)
Русские-то генералы аршин глотают.... ;)

PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 13:51

То есть российская медицина спину выпрямляет per os, американская - per anum

Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 20:26

Yes, it does seem that we have a lot of "ass" sayings. However, I would like to point out that the first time I heard the complete saying of "твою мать" I was appalled that any language could use this as a common saying. If anyone in America said something so crude about someone's mother, this would surely result in a fist-fight. Just a cultural difference, I guess. Still, I doubt even in Russian that anyone would use a tree trunk to straighten their back.

Now, for the purposes of this song, I am confused. Some comments here lead me to believe he "sucked on a log to straighten his back" (??? !!!)

But, since this IS an English translation. I would suggest something like "You crouch when you take that stick out of your ass."
I'm not sure if this gets the proper meaning across. The English meaning is, "You're so uptight and ridged (but you have NO SENSE of humor), and it's impossible for you to have fun." ("you crouch over" in this sentence poetically implies that "you fail". At least that's what it seems to imply to me. Other English speakers may interpret it differently. Maybe "You aren't being yourself." etc.)

PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 20:58

Фил, в песне речь просто о том, что у генерала была военная выправка (он держался очень прямо), а теперь постарел и ссутулился. Вот и все. И герой песни спрашивает генерала: "Куда делась твоя спина, прямая и напряженная, как натянутая струна?"

Phil AmbroPhil Ambro    Tor, 18/04/2019 - 21:51

Thank you for that explanation. I have no idea where all this "ramrod" and "sucking" stuff came from. So, thanks.

"How can such an upstanding man as you be so crouched over?"

My best translation of that line.

PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 22:28

А если в ритм?

PinchusPinchus
   Tor, 18/04/2019 - 23:54

Yes! Now you see the line "Straight back as of metal" (5 syllables) in the current version. Would you offer more appropriate version? It's desirable to keep rhyme with "medlas".
"Where's upstanding man"?