Perdu en toi
| Teşekkür Et! ❤ |  |  |
michealt tarafından 2018-06-14 tarihinde eklendi.michealt tarafından en son 2018-06-23 tarihinde düzenlendi| 1. | Someone You Loved |
| 2. | Before You Go |
| 3. | Wish You the Best |
michealt
Perş, 21/06/2018 - 18:59
Rosa, I copied my Spanish to https://lyricstranslate.com/en/lost-you-perdido-en-ti.html-1, and then overwrote the Spanish on this page with a new translation to French. I'd very much appreciate your comments on teh Spanish.
roster 31
Perş, 21/06/2018 - 19:05
Tom, voy a empezar:
1. Primer verso - "me estoy poniendo perdido" --> "me estoy perdiendo" es suficiente.
2. "que nunca no creía" --> O 'nunca' o 'no, una sola negación. (Lo mismo en el verso siguiente).
3. No 'cederme','ceder' o 'renunciar', no "me".
Segunda estrofa:
1. "corazón roto"--> "partido" o "herido" suena mejor.
2. "aunque no podría bastante darte.' --> "auque no podría darte bastante" suena mejor.
3. "Espero que seas" --> "Espero que estés".
4. "que no puedo" --> "porque no puedo" (?)
5. En la siguiente estrofa tienes "me he dedo" --> "dado"
En la siguiente esrtofa corta, más abajo:
1. "debería haber llevado nos dos" --.> "debería haberme llevado a los dos" o "a nosotros dos".
¿Cómo va el francés?
Au revoir
michealt
Perş, 21/06/2018 - 19:52
Thanks, Rosa. I've applied your corrections to teh Spanish translation (page referenced above).
I think the French version is reasonable, but to see it you may need to tell your browser to refresh this page - the French version has been here since 19:54, so over 10 minutes before your last comment.
Klou
Cum, 22/06/2018 - 18:42
tu ma fair -> tu m'as fait
You've forgotten to translate "giving up" in the 4th line
chorus, line 7: sûre -> "en sécurité", "en sûreté"
chorus, last line: to -> de
3rd stanza, line 2: c'était -> ce n'était
"rien" requires a "ne" (like "pas" and "plus"), if you just write "c'était" without "ne" then it sounds like casual French
3rd stanza, line 3: jamaid -> jamais
I think "autant" would fit better than "tellement". In this context, "tellement" would rather mean "much" than "so much". And I'd put it between "jamais" and "saigné".
3rd stanza, last line: vivée -> vécue
but "à une vive vécue après" sounds quite weird to me, I suggest you to rephrase, like " j'ai renoncé à la vie que j'aurais vécue ensuite", "j'ai renoncé à la vie qui aurait pu suivre" or something
5th stanza, line 2: it should be "ma prise" but "j'ai lâché prise" (without "ma") would sound better.
laissé -> laissée (the tricky rule about when the past participle agrees with the complement when it's before the verb)
5th stanza, line 3: J'aurais dû
"nous supporter" will be understood as "stand" like in "I can't stand you" but in the affirmative form (I don't know how to say that)
Maybe "nous soutenir"? Or if you want to keep the idea of carrying something you can try "nous porter".
tus les dwux -> tous les deux
I've read one comment of yours where you said you don't really reread your translations. That's too bad because your French is pretty good, most of the errors are just typos. You could try to use a French online corrector, it would help you to spot half of them. I don't know what browser you're using, I'm using Firefox and it's very easy to download dictionaries in a lot of languages and then you just have to right click to switch the language.
michealt
Cmt, 23/06/2018 - 01:00
Merci beaucoup, Klou. I feel pretty stupid for things like "supporter" (a famous false friend) and even more so for "vivée" (I don't know how I came up with that, it's not a word at all let alone not the right word).
Can you point me to a decent online corrector for French, please? (preferably one the fits firefox). I stopped using correctors decades ago when they did crazy things like insisting on American spelling and demanding that correct text be changed into ungrammatical nonsense. I guess they have improved since then.
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