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Dawn

I love the dawn because it's as if it were all mine
Just breathing in your air relaxes me just fine
I love the dawn because it's as if it were a lie
Relaxes me as long as it lasts, then far away you fly
 
Imagine us having crossed over our limits,
Having been side by side with habits,
Having even taken care of those old bruises
Surely we'll be distant more, more similar though,
we'll have eternal shivers inside our souls,
Imagine if all of this were really, really, true?
 
I love the dawn cause hating my own life is not rare at all
Walking along aimlessly down this strange road
I love the dawn because it's like a sane lunacy
That you can understand, feel for and not turn away
 
Imagine if everything had been over our limits
And we believed the smiles like comedians bother,
If we didn't have to talk to get to know each other,
If we didn't fall in love with people similar to us?
Maybe we've got eyes only to describe ourselves
Because a glance, deep down, is enough of a painting for us
 
When you are having a fine day, laugh and think of me
I have listened to my silences and have felt the shivering
Because it's you who resides inside my every breathing
And when you are having a fine day, laugh and think of me,
This, so that I never loose you, would be enough for me
Imagine though, if all of this were really, really, true?
 
Imagine though?
 
Versuri originale

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Comentarii
Don JuanDon Juan
   Sâmbătă, 11/02/2023 - 21:30

Please split your translation into stanzas.

citlālicuecitlālicue
   Sâmbătă, 11/02/2023 - 23:34

Format should look like this and you have a couple of mistakes:

I love the dawn because it's as if it were all mine
Just breathing in your air relaxes me just fine
I love the dawn because it;s as if it were a lie (it;s → it's)
Relaxes me as long as it lasts, then far away you fly

Imagine us having crossed over our limits,
Having been side by side with habits,
Having even taken care of those old bruises
Surely we'll be distant more, more similar though,
we'll have eternal shivers inside our souls,
Immagine if all of this were really, really, true? (Immagine → Imagine)

I love the dawn cause hatong my oen life is not rare at all (hatong → hating / oen → own)
Walking along aimlessly down this strange road
I love the dawn because it's like a sane lunacy
That you can understand, feel for and not turn away

Imagine if everything had been over our limits
And we believed the smiles like comedians bother,
If we didn't have to talk to get to know each other,
If we didn't fall in love with people similar to us?
Maybe we've got eyes only to describe ourselves
Because a glance, deep down, is enough of a painting for us

When you are having a fine day, laugh and think of me
I have listened to my silences and have felt the shivering
Because it's you who resides inside my every breathing
And when you are having a fine day, laugh and think of me,
This, so that I never loose you, would be enough for me
Imagine though, if all of this were really, really, true?

Imagine though?

vasssbamvasssbam
   Luni, 21/08/2023 - 10:47

thank you for your suggestions. I have incorporated them, I think.