Guest on 2012-09-30
citlālicue
crimson_antics
Sun, 30/09/2012 - 20:28
Here are some quick suggestions, I'm sure someone will be able to proofread it better :)
Beyound --> Beyond
"if my ways crossed torrents" --> I'd use 'paths' instead of 'ways'
"J'en ai vu tomber des pluies d'orage" --> I'd say 'torrential rains', 'thunderstorms' or 'stormy rains'. Or something along those lines, but 'raindrop' doesn't really fit here.
"before findind" --> finding
Hope this helped a little :)
(1) Si ma vie se traduit en je t'aime... c'est en français l'idée d'une concession. "Bien que ma vie soit Amour et bien que mes chemins aient croisé des torrents..." d'où le choix de "although"
(2) in my days of foolishness. I chose this expression which reflects teenagers' behaviour. When they are young, they are full of dreams and foolish. Then as time passes , they become wiser and more responsible.
My translation has been updated considering Petit élève 's excellent suggestions below.