First line: I've been waiting on her for a while ==> I think 'to wait for' is meant here. 'To wait on' has a different meaning...
Me, you're going to kill / ...cry a river, I will ==> You're going to kill me / ... I will cry a river ...
In my chest, I feel pain ==> Better: I feel pain in my chest
Ay Querida
Oh, Sweet Girl of Mine
Thanks! ❤ | ||
Notes: (1) cultural adaptation; (2) the original 'Ay caramba' might be an option; (3) this retains the rhyme of the original.
As with all creative translations, other versions are possible; this one just happens to be mine. :-)
1. | corazon cupable |
2. | Vete y aléjate de mí |
3. | Voy pa' ya |
Thank you. In English, you can also wait ON someone. My translations are not intended to be literal. My intention is to create a text that sounds natural (in North American English, that is) to the extent that's possible, of course, since some parts have certain poetic qualities as well, in terms of rythym and phono-aesthetic effects, which I'm also trying to reproduce, hence some of my choices with respect to word order. Thanks again! Cheers from the Mariana islands :-)
:-) The second line though suggests that the person has been waiting not ON (i.e. serve as a waiter in a restaurant would) but FOR the lady.
Anyway the English struck me as rather peculiar but fully understandable and perhaps you're right. But to reproduce the same sound-effects in a translation is almost impossible. Alas! Good Luck to You!
As a native speaker (born and raised in the US), it sounds fine---quite natural actually---with either preposition; it must have sounded fine to Jagger and Richards as well, if you're familiar with "Waiting on a Friend" (by The Rolling Stones). As for reproducing sound-related effects, it's certainly a challenge, as is reproducing other stylistic effects. Cheers!
TransCreated by Marcelo González