Oscar Brand - Humoresque (Passengers Will Please Refrain)
Humoresque (Passengers Will Please Refrain)
Passengers will please refrain
From flushing toilets while the train
Is in the station. Darling, I love you!
We encourage constipation
While the train is in the station
Moonlight always makes me think of you.
If you wish to pass some water,
kindly call the pullman porter,
He'll place a vessel in the vestibule.
If the porter isn't here,
Try the platform in the rear-
The one in front is likely to be full.
If the woman's room be taken,
Never feel the least forsaken,
Never show a sign of sad defeat.
Try the men's room in the hall,
And if some man has had the call,
He'll courteously relinquish you his seat.
If these efforts all are vain,
Then simply break a window pane-
This novel method used by very few.
We go strolling through the park
Goosing statues in the dark,
If Sherman's horse can take it, why can't you?
|thanked 7 times|