Hey, Jala! I may not be the best or more qualified person here like Ellen, Manu or the other Spanish speaking users, but I think you did a pretty good job, congrats! :) I'd rate it, but as I don't consider myself a fluent Spanish speaker yet I don't think it'd be valid.

There are just some small things I'd like to suggest - feel free to accept or not.

dares to go > dares going
You'll reach places where no one could imagine and beyond > You'll reach places no one could imagine and beyond
Carring > Carrying
The rain and light with us > The rain and light

You may also want to check the 'I can't explain where we'll return carrying the secrects of the and the light with us' verse as a whole because it seems there's a word missing.

However, it seems to me the lyrics need some proofreading as lack of diacritics may drastically change meaning when translating. I'll take a look at them later.

¡Hola Jala y Juan! 😁

I've made changes to the lyrics according to the official audio and left a note in the submitte's comments, since the version that's sung in the video has slight changes, but they don't affect the original lyrics.

I'll check your translation later. 😉

respira más hondo → take a deep breath
danza el dolor → dance through the pain

A suggestion for this stanza:
Tú llegarás hasta donde
nadie se imaginó
y más allá, te acercarás
a lo que tú ya dejaste atrás.

You'll reach where
none could've imagined,
and far beyond, you'll approach
what you had left behind.

Lluvia que limpia, que sana → Rain that cleanses, that heals
y que salva nos mojará... → and that saves, will drench us...

Ya lo descubriste → Now that you know (lit. 'You've already found out')
si el cielo llora → (it's true that it's 'if the sky cries/is crying' but could change that 'if' to 'that' → that the sky cries)