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Album:
Stovies (1980)
The Bantam Cock
He was a fine upstanding bantam cock
So brisk and stiff and spry
With a springy step and a jaunty plume
And a purposeful look in his eye
In his little black laughing eye
So I took him to the coop and introduced him to
My seventeen wide-eyed hens
And he tucked and he tucked as a hero tucks
And he bowed to them all, and then
He up and took 'em all again
Well, then upon the peace of my ducks and geese
He boldly did intrude
And with glazed eyes and opened mouths
They bore him with fortitude
And a little bit of gratitude
He jumped my giggling guinea-fowl
He thrust his attentions upon
Me twenty hysterical turkeys
And a visiting migrant swan
And the bantam thundered on
He groped my fan-tail pigeon doves
And my lily-white columbine
And as I was a lookin' at my budgerigar
He jumped my parrot from behind
He was sittin' on me shoulder at the time
But all of a sudden, with a gasp and a gulp
He clapped his wings to his head
He lay flat on his back with his feet in the air
My bantam cock was dead
And the vultures circled overhead
What a noble beast
What a champion cock
What a way to live and to die
But as I dug him a grave to protect his bones
From those hungry buzzards in the sky
The bantam opened up a sly little eye
He gave me a wink, and a terrible grin
The way that rapists do
He said, "Do you see them silly daft buggers up there?
They'll be down in a minute or two
They'll be down in a minute or two!"
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