Aiobahn

インターネットやめろ - English translation

Album:
NEEDY STREAMER OVERLOAD
Original lyrics
Translation

インターネットやめろ

インターネット・エンジェルという現象は
仮定された有機交流電燈の
かわいい虹色の照明です ぶいっ
あらゆる透明なアカウントの複合体
 
このクソゴミカスキショキショな現実を
忘れさせてあげる 慈愛の天使
大人のみんなにはナイショだぞ
大丈夫もうなにも怖くないから
 
こんなSNS抜けだして二人で海を見に行くぞ!
インターネット や・め・ろ~!!!
 
わかる真似をして なにも知らないね アナタ
なにが悲しいの なにが寂しいの 聴こえてる?
人が恋しくて 人がイヤすぎて ループ
夜が好きなのに 一人じゃ寒くて 震えてる
 
ほんとうは幸せを知っているのに
不幸なフリやめられないね
 
アンチに負けず 信者に媚びず
どんなに努力を重ねても
一寸先は地獄行き
いやもうすでに冥府魔道
地獄の沙汰もいいね次第
偽善者トラップ蜘蛛の糸
こんなに苦しい筈なのに
インターネットがやめられないない!
 
発狂!
 
かけめぐるエクスタシー 融けるマイスリー
画面光りだすの 不安止まらないよ
誰か殺してくれ イヤだ死にたくない
朝は見たくないの
ムリだ! 死ぬ! アタマが割れてく!!!!!
 
それでもわたしはこのカオスをオタクと歩む
ここにしかない光景を見つけに行くから
あんなにおそろしい乱れたインターネットから
この雪みたいに美しい毒電波がきたんだよ
 
カウンセリングを受けたの
先生から「ネットをやめろ」って言われて
もうおまえらと会えないと思った瞬間 胸が苦しくて
リアルが壊れてもココが良いって思ったの
 
初めてフォローされた日のこと覚えてる
こんなわたしを見て・承認してくれたヌクモリティ
もう細かいことはどうでもいいね せーのっ
インターネット最高 !!!
 
ほとばしるエクスタシー 甘い夢をみせてマイスリー
指先で感じる 泳ぐ電子の海 インターネット・ボーイ
悲しみ舞い散る 暗い闇の中 インターネット・ゲーム
アナタのとなり微笑む 忘れないでいてね インターネット・ガールきっと……
 
キボンヌ! オワタ! 半年ROMれ! キタ――(゚∀゚)――!! age! 漏れ! 香具師! 逝ってよし! 久々にワロタ! ぽまいら! これは 乙じゃなくてポニーテールなんだからね! フヒヒ! ぬるぽ! 禿同!
 
無理ぽ! (キボンヌ!) オマエモナー! (オワタ!) お礼は三行! (半年ROMれ!) うp汁! (キタ――(゚∀゚)――!!) (age!) 日本語でおk! (漏れ!)(香貝師!) >>1の母です (久々にワロタ!) キボンヌ! オワタ! 半年ROMれ! キタ――(゚∀゚)――!! age! 漏れ! 香具師! 逝ってよし! 禿同!
 
好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好き! 好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-好-
 
......
 
青白いモニター越しの光を通し
オタクの孤独を癒やして回る
わたしはインターネットの天使なのだ

QUIT THE INTERNET

The phenomenon which they call an "Internet Angel"
is a cutesy rainbow illumination
that comes from a supposedly "organic" AC electric light, BANG!
(She's a) composite of every transparent account!
 
I'll make you forget about this jaw-droppingly shitty and trashy reality
as an Angel of Charity
Keep this a secret from all adults!
And don't worry, nothing scares me anymore
 
Let's get off of social media, and we'll go together to see the ocean!*
Quit the Internet~!!!
 
You imitate others like you know everything, but you actually don't know anything, you...
What's making you sad? What's making you lonely? Can you hear me?
I miss people a lot, I don't wanna be around people a lot... It's a loop
Even though I like the night, I'm trembling in the cold all alone
 
"The truth is I know how to be happy,
but I just can't stop pretending I'm miserable."
 
Don't let the antis* get the better of you! Don't let the believers get to you!
No matter how hard you try,
you'll just end up in Hell anyway
No, actually, maybe it's a good thing
that dark magic from Hell is already in the air
Hypocrites are trapped in the spider web
Even though I should be in a lot of pain,
I just can't stop using the internet!!!
 
I'M GOING INSANE!
 
I'm running around in ecstasy, I'm melting in Zolpidem* (misery)
I can't keep that glowing screen off of my mind
Someone, put me out of my misery, but I don't wanna die!
I don't want to see the morning come
It's pointless! I'll die! My mind's being blown!!!!!
 
"And still, I'm going to tread on through all of the incels in this chaos,
and find a sight only known to me.
For from the chaos of the internet comes
a poisonous signal as beautiful as snow..."
 
"I went to counseling (therapy),
and the doctor (therapist) said to 'Get off the Internet.'
My heart hurt at the thought of never seeing you all again...
I thought, even if the real world was destroyed, I would have been better off here!"
 
"I remember the day when I got my first follower,
the day that a kind netizen looked at me and approved of me,
Ah, I just don't care about the little things anymore... Say it with me!"
THE INTERNET IS THE BEST!!!
 
I'm gushing out ecstasy, I'm having sweet dreams on Zolpidem (misery)
An ocean of swimming electrons is at your fingertips, Internet boy
Sadness dances in the air as I play internet games in the dark
I'm smiling next to you, surely you won't forget your Internet girl...
 
("storytime pls!" "end my life! :D" "read the description" "she's here!" ――(゚∀゚)――!!" "YAAASS!" "1'm H3R3" "pog" "ok boomer" "no u" "that's not a 'Z,' its a ponytail..." "LMFAOOOOO" ">embed fail" "major W")
 
("storytime pls!" "end my life! :D" "read the description" "she's here!" ――(゚∀゚)――!!" "YAAASS!" "1'm H3R3" "pog" "ok boomer" "no u" "that's not a 'Z,' its a ponytail..." "LMFAOOOOO" ">embed fail" "major W")
 
I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE IT! I LIKE- I LIKE- I LIKE- I LIKE- I LIKE- I LIKE- I LIKE- I LIKE-
 
...
 
I heal lonely incels
through the pale light coming through their monitors.
That’s becuz I am an Internet Angel!
Likes 58
expand collapse Translation details

Please note: I emphasize readability of my translations from a native English speaker's standpoint, so not everything may be 100% text accurate for a clearer understanding. Thanks! -ONKC Central

Please do not reprint my translations without asking first! Thanks!

ONKC-Central ONKC-Central
submitted on 25 Apr 2023 - 01:00

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Added in reply to request by HL24HL24
Author's comments:

*1: this basically is the Japanese language equivalent of "Go touch grass! or "Go outside!"
*2: "antis" refer to haters/trolls
*3: This is a Japanese word for the prescription sleeping drug Zolpidem (Japanese brand name: "MySlee"/Maisurii). In Western countries it is most commonly known as "Ambien." Some side effects are hallucinations and sleepwalking. The Japanese word for it is similar to the pronunciation of the English word "misery" (Mizerii OR Maizurii depending on usage) which I would assume is intentional.

For the slang section it is full of new and old 2ch slang. Some of which has carried over to Twitch streaming commentary. The singer of this song is a streamer, so I translated as such. It is NOT 100% accurate, but I tried my best to find English language equivalents of each of the slang. If anyone has any better suggestions, please reach out to me.

EDIT: I changed “Otaku” to “incel” as the two words have a similar negative connotation. In Japan, “Otaku” does not just refer to “anime fan” as it does in the west, it is a derogatory term used by others to describe men who are on the “creepy” side, who are a little too obsessed with anime, trains, or IRL idols.

EDIT 2: As I've improved in my translation work, I've made a few minor changes.

Play video with subtitles

Comments 5

HL24 HL24
25 Apr 2023, 13:15

Thank you!
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
HL24

pluto13x pluto13x
5 Jun 2023, 16:02
5

Good job, you clearly put a lot of effort into this

CptJohn CptJohn
8 Mar 2025, 05:18

in your comments you equate otaku with the western term incel and indicate that being obsessed with trains is a defining trait of this demographic. Are train fans a taboo in japan? and if so, is it just the hikikomori type or is it all individuals who desire more walkable cities with better access to public transit?

Aside from that I appreciate the translations. I figured it was about an individual with an unhappy relationship with the internet but I love understanding the nuances of the lyrics

ONKC-Central ONKC-Central A
10 Mar 2025, 23:11

Not all "densha otaku" are taboo in Japan. Like most hobbyists most are harmless fans. However in that comment specifically I was referring to a specific type of "densha otaku/train otaku" that use the subculture as a cover to commit crime such as trespassing, doxxing/online threats, destruction of public property, and theft, and then claim that they are only doing it for the sake of their devotion in the hobby. This behavior from a few select individuals has caused a negative look on the hobby since the 1970s.

Additionally, it is/was a well known community active on 2channel and its successors, which is what many of the references made in this song refer to.

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